Starstruck (the Idea of Always)

Vrijdag 21:12

Lucas

Lucas sat at the halfpipe with his leg strewn on top of Jens's, holding Jens's hand in his lap, keeping his close as long as he possibly could before Jens left that night. Their skateboards were behind them, Jens's bag on top of his. Lucas didn't like looking at his bag. He was trying to ignore the fact that Jens was leaving. As he looked up to the stars, his head tilted back, he listened to the music playing from the speakers behind them, listened to the party-goers, friends and strangers, laughing and dancing. Someone had set up lights, strung up lanterns, set up a DJ station, had set up a drink station, and Lucas and Jens ended up at the party, practically dragged by Jayden and Kes, who had disappeared in the crowd of dancers, with their bottles and plastic cups.

Lucas's own plastic cup was next to him, still almost completely full. He didn't feel like drinking. And apparently neither did Jens, who had declined beers from several people when they first arrived.

"This is good," Lucas said and turned to look at Jens. Jens was already looking at him, smiling softly.

"Mm-hmm."

They looked at each other for a second before Jens started dancing, moving his shoulders and nodding to the beat of the music, and Lucas watched, amused, before joining, copying him. Jens laughed and lifted Lucas's hand with his, throwing his head back and closing his eyes, humming with the music. Lucas leaned over, pulling Jens closer by tugging on his hand, and pressed a kiss to the side of his neck, scooting closer and reaching his other hand out to touch the side of Jens's face as he turned to look at Lucas.

Lucas swallowed, admiring Jens's face. He ran his fingers over his brow and cheekbones, gently touching the mole next to his eye, running a fingertip over the angle of his jaw as he leaned in to kiss him. Their fingers twisted together in Lucas's lap, and Lucas felt Jens place his other hand on his leg, squeezing his knee. He pulled away, pressing his forehead to Jens's, and let go of his hand, moving so his leg was on the ground, around Jens, and his other leg was on top of his lap. One hand moved up, tangling in his hair, and he touched Jens's throat with the other, feeling it vibrate as Jens continued to hum. Jens shifted, facing Lucas more, and put both hands on him, running them across his waist, until he gripped it and pulled Lucas closer. Both of them closed their eyes.

"I'm gonna miss you." Lucas's voice was small, sounding almost scared.

Jens pulled away, Lucas's forehead becoming cold, and looked at him, pushing a curl out of his face tenderly. He kissed him softly before saying, "That's okay."

"I don't want to miss you."

"I'll only be a few hours away."

"Still."

"...I don't want to miss you either."

Lucas sighed, wrapping his arms around Jens's neck, and buried his face between his neck and his own arm, pressing a soft kiss to the exposed skin. Jens pulled him closer, pulling his legs up and moving them so they were around Lucas. They swayed slightly, Lucas digging his fingers into Jens's jacket, holding on like Jens would fall apart if he let go.

"This wasn't supposed to happen," Lucas mumbled against Jens. The words were almost lost in the music.

"What wasn't?" Jens pushed him back to look at him, and Lucas kept his arms around his neck.

He thought for a second, about how to explain it, and Jens waited.

"When I went to Antwerp..." He paused, his eyes on Jens's mouth absentmindedly. "When I went to Antwerp it was to take a break from it all. I was supposed to... chill."