53-Solivagant

105 10 3
                                    

*wandering alone*

(Petition for Bighit to bring Orange haired Jimin and Mint haired Yoongi back.)
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He painted me as his.

This was the thought that crossed my mind Every. Single. Time. I looked at the growing baby bump. To think that a part of him was growing inside me made me love him even more than before. I missed him every single second. I wanted him to be there, for me and his child. I wanted him to caress the bump, speak and sing for the child. I wanted our child to grow up listening to his angelic voice and be born as an exact replica of him. I wanted a mini us running around the house.

It just wasn't that I was sad, I was scared. I was scared that no one was there for me. I was scared at the thought of being alone and being told lies. Yeah, things that happened in my life were sad, but I told myself one thing.

Don't erase. Just turn the page.

These thoughts kept running around my mind 24/7. I packed my bag and sat on the bed not knowing what to do. I wanted to work. I simply couldn't stay idle. That wasn't my style. But I wanted to have a huge holiday too. Things were just not going my way.

When a photographer can't change a scene, he changes his angle and lens to capture the best of that scene. Similarly, when you can't change a situation in your life, change your perspective and mindset to get the best out of that situation. Try to be a filter, not a sponge.

(I am acting like I'm not singing filter while typing this.😂😂)

I spent another day at the hotel and set off on my journey back home. I had to empty the place and hand it over to the house owner. I had been on the trip to clear my mind and I got my answers really soon. I got them soon enough to stop wasting time and get on with life.
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"I'm fine. Thankfully all things like morning sickness are gone. The fact that I thought it was due to the concussion makes me laugh so much." I laughed into the phone.

"I never thought I'd see the old you ever again. I am so so happy to hear your boisterous laugh again." Maren said softly.

"You know me. I am not someone who keeps a long face for long." I smiled.

"Best character ever. I am happy for you. You've been through so much babe. I only want the best for you." She sighed.

"This is not the end yet. I have a baby to push out of my body. All alone, I might add." I said, voice dropping low in fear. The thought of going through all that alone truly frightened me.

"I feel so bad for not being there with you. I was already planning to come back there during your due date." She replied, taking me by surprise.

"What the hell? You are not crossing continents just to see me scream in pain." I shouted, to which she just laughed.

"Chill. Don't make your baby hear you. I don't want another brat like you as a nephew." She said.

This girl.

"Am I really that bad? I want an exact copy of me to be honest. I have such great qua..."

"Oh shut up please. I really hope the child turns out like Jimin. At least...oh. I'm sorry." She stopped midway.

"It's alright. His name isn't dangerous." I laughed. "You can say anything about him. I don't hold a grudge against him anymore. I just accepted my situation."

"See? This is your problem. He doesn't deserve your love and sympathy after all he's done."

"Forget him. Let's talk about you."

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