[Sofia's POV]
I sat down on the couch in the office.
The room gave a comforting vibe, some plants and flowers placed beside the windows.
Blankets laying on the couch.
Fluffy pillows.
I started picking on my nails immediately as we sat down, and of course the therapist noticed it.
"I would be happy if you used one of the fidget objects instead of picking on your nails" she said gently.
I blushed and looked away.
She stood up from her chair and grabbed a green ball that she handed over to me.
It was soft and squishy, it took my attention.
"So why don't we start by introducing ourselves? My name is Hannah and I work as a therapist and have been doing that for ten years now, In my spare time I like to go on hikes with my friends. My favorite color is Yellow and my favorite place to be is on the beach" she said.
"You can go next" Hannah said and nodded towards Maya.
"My name is Maya and I'm a firefighter, Captain over station 19. In my spare time I like to go on a run or for a walk. My favorite color is Red and my favorite place to be is at home" Maya said.
When I looked up from the floor they both looked at me.
"M-my name is Sofia and uhm my favorite color is blue" I said.
"Okay that's a good start, do you play any sports?" She asked.
"No" I said.
"Alright, In this first session we are going to have today we're only going to get to know each other and do some easy answered questions" Hannah said.
"Wait, how many sessions are we going to have?" I asked.
"As many as it takes" she said and smiled.
I sighed and leaned back on the couch, this is going to take forever.
"When did you move here?" She asked.
"A couple of days ago" I said.
"Who did you live with before?" She asked.
"My father" I said.
"And what about your mother?" She questioned.
"She died" I said bluntly.
"I'm sorry for your loss, Your sister mentioned something about your brother. Were you close?" She asked.
"I don't want to do this anymore" I said clearly frustrated, I stood up from the couch.
"Okay that's fine we don't have to talk about that yet" Hannah said.
I sat back down again.
I saw that Hannah was taking notes on her notepad.
"What are you writing down?" I asked.
"Just some notes" she said gently.
"I'm not crazy you know, I don't need therapy" I said.
"You don't have to be crazy to go to therapy, people go here because they want help or need to vent their emotions" she said.
"How are you sleeping and eating? Do you have a regular time for that?" She asked.
"I eat breakfast and dinner" I said.
"I would like it if you ate lunch too, what about your sleeping schedule" she said.
"It's good" I said.
"Is it something you would like to talk about today?" She asked.
"Nope I'm all good" I said.
"Alright, in the next session I would like it if you would come alone. Maya is more than welcome to wait outside" she said.
"Why?" I asked.
"I do that with all my clients, but if it gets to much for you Maya can join us again. I'm not forcing you" she said.
"Okay" I said.
"Alright see you next time then" Hannah said.
I gave her a small wave and then I left with Maya.
"So, would you like to come with me to the station or would you rather stay here?" Maya asked.
"I think I'll stay here, sorry" I said.
"It's okay, you can come with me another time. Great job today" she said.
"Great job? I barely said anything" I said.
"I know but just stepping in to the therapist office is a big step" she said.
"Yeah, see you later then" I said.
Maya walked to the parking lot while I walked to the attending lounge. There was a woman in there when I sat down by the table.
"You must be Carinas sibling, you look so much like her" the woman said.
"Yeah, I'm Sofia" I said awkwardly.
"I'm Amelia, she's talked so much about you" she said.
"Good things I hope" I said and chuckled.
"Yes of course" she said.
"Are you an OB too?" I asked.
"No I'm a neurosurgeon" she said.
"Oh wait I think she's talked about you, your doctor Shepard right?" I asked suddenly remembering a memorize of Carina talking about a Shepard.
"Yes, well my brother was a neurosurgeon too" she said.
"Ah, does he work here?" I asked.
"Sadly he passed away two years ago, but before that he worked here" she said.
"Oh I'm so sorry" I said sincerely.
"It's okay, I guess we can both relate to how it feels losing a brother" she said.
"Mmhm yeah" I answered quietly.
"Well, it was nice meeting you but I have to go to a patient now" she said.
"Alright" I said.
I scrolled thru my phone until Carina arrived.
"Hi did surgery go well?" I asked.
"Yeah, how was therapy?" She asked.
"I don't want to got there more, I don't even know how it's supposed to help me. I'm not crazy or depressed Carina I don't need help" I said.
"Your not crazy and maybe your not depressed but that doesn't mean it would be good for you to talk to someone" she said.
"But you don't talk to a therapist" I mumbled.
"No your right I don't"
"Everyone deals with trauma and losses in different ways, I usually cry it out and then the pain is bearable"
"But you bambina tend to shut down completely and not wanting to talk to anyone about anything, we can't have it like that Sof and you know it too" she said.
"I don't shut down" I defended myself.
"But in a little bit you do bambina, you won't talk to me and I'm sorry to say it but you did the same thing when mom died. You still haven't talked to anyone about that, you just turned your emotions off. Maybe it would be good for you to talk about the past" she said.
"Well maybe that's my way of coping then, what's wrong with that" I said trying to defend myself again.
"It's not healthy tho, you can't just keep bottling your emotions inside Sof. Eventually your going to break" she said.
"I'm not made of glass" I said.
"I know that Bella, can you please just try for me?" She asked.
I sighed knowing I can't tell my sister no.
"I'll try"
