What's wrong with us when happy hurts

I'd say goodnight and place you right there on my table where I slept

Notes:

I am so so very sorry it took me forever to update. I am so sorry for another long wait. This year is just not my family's year....
Life has been a lot lately. I'm really trying to get back to my old schedule.

Here's the next chapter, sorry it's a rather short one but I really wanted to update and meant to for weeks but never managed to actually write the next chapter. So here it is. Let me know what you think.

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Part 56 

I'd say goodnight and place you right there on my table where I slept when I would drink, you made me think , bout all the things that I regret you used to give me life but it was clear you wanted me dead

Dinah

She spent most of the day just walking around Star City, revisiting some places she used to love back when she still lived here and hadn't visited since. The longer she spent alone with herself and her thoughts, the more she regretted her brief outburst. It hadn't been her place. And it hadn't been the right place or time to share the information. She had just been done with everyone and their bullshit and thought it was important they knew what the consequences of their actions could lead to. She still thought so, but she also knew that neither her daughter, nor her... whatever Oliver currently was to her, would be happy about it. No, far from it. But it wasn't like they would let anyone know about the reality of their situation. And she understood and respected why they refused to share their struggles with anyone, but not sharing them and acting as if everything was alright around their friends and family wasn't going to help them understand what was going on and why they should think before they speak or consider the possible backlash their actions and words could have. The consequences of people keep on piling their shit or issues on Sara and especially Oliver could potentially be catastrophic.

A part of her still believed that everyone in Laurel's living room, maybe besides Donna, needed to hear what she had said. But that didn't change the rather unpleasant feeling she had, thinking about the reaction Sara or Oliver would have if they learnt about it. The last thing she ever wanted to do was cause them even more pain or issues to struggle or deal with.

The couple was going to be parents in just a few short months... she wasn't sure about the exact due date. Neither of them had shared that information. She only knew that it was in late February... which meant it could also be mid-February or early March... the calculations tended to be a little off most of the time. Especially when it was a woman's first child. Sara and Oliver needed to be able to focus on that. On the birth of their child, getting accustomed to the thought of becoming parents. They needed to be able to focus on that, not on everyone else's problems. They shouldn't have to suffer the consequences of other people's actions. No, they've suffered enough. And they were working so hard on getting better. On healing as much as they could. The last thing they needed was all this negativity around them. Having the people around them put them down and trying to keep them down instead of helping them improve, get better. They should encourage them, ease their pain and help lift them up, not drag them back down.

There should've been no need for her to share such personal information with anyone in order to have them realize what their actions could do to two people who were already struggling mentally. No, they should've come to that conclusion all by themselves. But it seemed that would never be the case, or would take forever.

Yes, she could understand Laurel's perspective and reasons. She had even encouraged her to get the answers she had been seeking for such a long time. She should've known better. Should've realized what the question to those answers could do to Sara and Oliver. But as much as she wanted to protect them, keep all the things that could make them relapse away from them... as much as she loved them and understood why they kept it from everyone, that they were not at fault for falling in love... Laurel was her daughter too. And she had seen first-hand how much Sara and Oliver's actions had hurt her. How much all of those questions had been eating at her. And she loved both of her daughters equally, if differently. And she didn't want either of them to hurt. Even less because of something that had happened such a long time ago. And Laurel had moved on. There had been no chance or even interest on either side of her and Oliver to resume their relationship or give it another try. Not for several years. But there had been tension underlying for years, closer to the surface from the moment Oliver had come home with Sara. And she would've hated Laurel and Sara's relationship falling apart for good because of the anger and resentment that had festered over the years. All she wanted was for her babies to get along again. To bury the hatched and leave the past in the past, where it belonged. But that was only possible if the issues were being addressed. Which they now have been.