Dear Suzzette ✓

𝒇𝒊𝒇𝒕𝒚-𝒐𝒏𝒆

Chapter 51

Make it right

I want my memories back.

That's what I always thought.Gusto Kong matandaan ang mga alaala para mabuo ang pagkatao ko.Hindi ko gustong pangalan ko Lang,at pamilya ang natatandaan ko.Gusto kong maalala ang Kung anong buhay ang Meron ako Dati,Kung paano ko nakilala si Levi,Kung anong klaseng Tao ako Dati.Kung ano ang nangyari bago ang aksidente.

Pero ngayon...

I can truly say that Innocence is indeed a bliss.

Pinagsisihan ko na bumalik ang mga alaala ko.Mas gusto ko pang mabuhay na Lang sa bagong pagkatao ko.I clenched my teeth to calm my nerves.Levi.He lied to me.Hindi ko maiwasan na masaktan.Hindi ko alam kung dahil sa pagsisinungaling niya sa akin o dahil sa katotohanan na Hindi Siya ang asawa ko.

He's not my husband.

He's not mine.

We were never been married.

Because I am tied to someone.

I am not Suzzette Escuderro.

I am Suzzette Hamilton.

I breathed deeply to calm my nerves.Sumasakit ang puso ko.All I could feel is the anguish and pain.Gusto Kong magalit sa kanya,Pero Hindi ko Kaya.Galit ako sa sarili ko.Pero lalong lalo na sa taong iyon.

He took my freedom away from me.Ginulo niya ang buhay ko.Ginawa niya akong tanga.He abused my liberty as a woman.Paulit ulit na sinaktan.Matinding poot ang namamayani sa akin.

"L-Love..."

Napaangat ang tingin ko sa taong kakapasok Lang.He was dressed in a grey cotton shirt and faded denim pants.I stared at him blankly.Lumapit Siya sa akin at hinawakan ang kamay ko.Nag iinit ang gilid nang mga Mata ko.My heart is clenching in pain.

I was hospitalised again for two days.Sa loob nang dalawang araw na iyon,sa pagtulog ko ay ang pagbalik nang mga ala ala ko.Mga alaala na gusto ko na Lang kalimutan ulit.Levi was the one who saw me lying on the cold floor and hurriedly rushed me to the hospital.

"Do you want to eat?Do you need something?May mga Masakit pa ba sayo?"

Nag iinit ang puso ko sa mga tanong niya.Paano ako magagalit sa kanya Kung wala siyang ibang ginawa kundi ang alagaan at mahalin ako.Naalala ko, kahit noon pa man ganito na talaga Siya.Mas inuuna ako kaysa sa sarili niya.Handa siyang magpaubaya para sa kaligayahan ko.And me the dumb and stupid didn't notice that he was already creeping into my system without me noticing it.

I keep denying it.I keep denying that I didn't love him.Sinaktan ko na Siya kahit noon pa man.He was the only man who love me even though I don't deserve it.Siya palagi ang takbuhan ko noon.Siya na Lang palagi ang umiintindi,ang nagpaparaya,Siya din ang nagpapasaya sa akin.His thoughtfulness and gentleness would always bring joy to my heart.

I gasped.I didn't answer,instead I averted my eyes from him.I can't stand looking at him without hurting.

"T-Tell me do you need something,hmm?" I shut my eyes because of his soothing voice.He brought my hands to his lips and softly place a kiss on it.

My breathing ragged.Napakagat na Lang ako sa Labi ko.He lied.But I know it was for my own good.Ako pa Rin ang Iniisip niya.

"W-Why?" Nanginginig ang Labi na tanong ko.

"Hmm?"

"W-Why...?" my voice broke and tears couldn't stop strolling from my eyes.Nanlalabo ang paningin ko.

My breathing became unstable due to the excruciating pain.

"W-Why are you always l-like that?"

He didn't respond.Nakatitig Lang Siya sa akin.His jaw clenched.I know he already knew that I can remember everything now.

"Y-You w-want apple-"

"I am not your wife." Sa nanginginig na Labi ay nagawa Kong sabihin iyon sa kanya,deritso sa kanyang mata.

His eyes lost it's glow.It turned into blank expression.I gasped for air.This is too much.

"Y-You are not my h-husband..." nahihirapan akong sabihin iyon.Masakit sa akin.Mahal ko siya at ang malaman na Hindi totoo ang lahat ay ang pinakamasakit na reyalidad.

It was like I'm in Dreamtopia.Na parang nasa panaginip ako at bigla na Lang akong magigising sa reyalidad na Hindi totoo ang lahat.Because in reality,my life is messed up.

"Y-You a-are not m-mine...W-We are not ma...married." I struggled on saying the last part because it was too painful.

Mas lalong nalukot ang puso ko nang pagod niya ibinagsak ang ulo.Humigpit ang hawak niya sa akin.I bit my lower lip as the new batch of tears started streaming on my face.His shoulder began to shake,only to find out that he was crying hard.I shut my eyes tightly and breathed for some air cause seeing him cry like this is too painful.

He cried like a baby while holding my hands.He then lifted his eyes on me,namumula ang mga mata,basa ang pisngi dahil sa luha,and I could see that he's hurting...too.

He doesn't deserve this.He doesn't deserve being hurt.Ako na lang palagi ang nananakit sa kanya.Kahit noon pa man.My Leonardo Vincenzo Escuderro the Third didn't deserve a woman like me.

"Y-You are going to l-leave me again?T-To ask that I s-should let Y-You go?Just like what you always did?"

Napaawang ang Labi ko.Nakikita ko ang sakit na dumaan sa kanyang mga Mata.I hate myself for hurting him.Levi just look like he's a tough and ruthless on the outside but he's the baby and a softie on the inside.Kaya kahit noon pa man Hindi na ako naniniwala na masama Siyang Tao.

People would always judge him as the way he look as heartless and cold but in real situation,he always care and protect.

He doesn't deserve this.He's so precious and I also want to protect him.Like he always do.

"I-I am not,l-love.I will not leave you..." I smiled softly at him. "I told you,Kahit ilang beses Ka pang magtago nang sekreto sa akin,Mahal pa din Kita.Hindi Kita iiwan."

Mas lalo akong naiyak nang maalala ang anak ko.I realized just now,na Inako niya si Selene.Inalagaan at tinuring na anak habang tulog pa ako.He didn't neglect her like what Eren did.Nandiyan Siya palagi sa akin,he even left his work on the Philippines just for me.He helped me to get healed.But I realized that he's the only healing that I want.

"Bumalik Tayo nang Pilipinas." I said direct to his eyes.

I saw confusion and fright on his eyes.

"What do you mean?You said-"

I smiled and touched his hands to assure him.

"I want to face the reality,Third.I want to face it..." I heaved a sigh. "with you by my side." I said with determination.

He looks confused for a moment but he suddenly realized what I have just said so he give me a small smile.He leaned to me and give me a kiss on my temple.

Just this once,I want to make everything right.For him.He doesn't deserve me but I will do everything to deserve him.Because of him I felt a temporary healing and I believe that with him I can completely feel the healing...and freedom.

My annulment is long overdue.I have to get away from the chains of my painful past.I have to face my husband...I mean my real husband who cause me a lot of damage.

_______________________________________

Di ko talaga kayang magsulat nang painful scene.This was supposed to be the break up of LeVette.But anyway,I am still satisfied.

This is a short update,just a warm up for the upcoming chapter.

Next update is on Sunday .

;>