Won't you believe me? (Servant no more - book 2)

Chapter 16

Lan Xichen stood at the window of Lan Qiren's study and was watching Wei Wuxian interacting with Lan Wangji and A-Yuan until all three of them did not leave the courtyard where the rabbits were kept. His heart was full of happiness and hope for the future, more specifically for Wei Wuxian's future.

Watching the boy be this relaxed was great. Although Lan Xichen was only seeing all of his reactions from a distance, he could tell that right now, the boy was the most calm since his first time coming to the Cloud Recesses Manor. Not that he had seen him all that often but he could just tell from the few encounters ha actually had with the boy. Lan Wangji was truly doing a spectacular job whether he himself knew it or not.

If things would progress at this incredible pace, Lan Xichen would not have to worry about Wei Wuxian getting better and opening up to the world. If his brother would stay this dedicated to passing time with him and treating him gently and with care and respect he deserved, Wei Wuxian could hopefully break his past habits and servant attitude which had been installed into him by his adoptive family.

Yes, Lan Xichen did not worry about his future if things would remain like this. There were however two points which still could tilt the scales into an unfavourable direction. First, everyone in the Cloud Recesses Manor would have to make Wei Wuxian feel welcomed and not pressured at all. And second, the boy would have to actually believe them that things would change for him here.

Lan Xichen was not too worried about the servants of the mansion as those knew fully well how to approach one of their own; most of them had once been in a similar, if a lot less serious, situation. He was also inclined to believe that the rest of his family, including the branch ones, would not cause another incident like the one with Su Minshan. Lan Qiren also seemed to have come around when it concerned Wei Wuxian if his maladroit apology to him was anything to go by. Even if this part would probably take some time to take root and bloom.

Lan Xichen was still very much shaken by this morning's revelations and he knew he needed more time to work through everything. Without Mo Xuanyu bringing the matter to his attention, he would have never suspected that his distant cousin would be capable of something like this. The fact that he had beaten Wei Wuxian inside the Cloud Recesses Manor and made him believe that it had been an earned and deserved punishment, after Lan Xichen had reassured the boy that nothing like that would ever happen to him here, was heart-breaking and infuriating. Although Su Minshan had been punished and exiled from the Cloud Recesses Manor, the damage had unfortunately already been done.

That was why Lan Xichen was now uncertain if Wei Wuxian had actually believed them that he would be safe and treated well in his new home. He could not tell what the youth was thinking now and it worried him to no end. They had, however unknowingly and unwillingly, betrayed the boy's trust even before it could fully form.

They could tell him hundreds upon hundreds of times that everything would change for him now but if they would not back it up with actions and prove their promises, it would remain just that, empty and untrustworthy words. Surely Wei Wuxian had already heard so many promises which never came true that he would disregard them in order to save himself some suffering.

Jiang Yanli had after all told them how her brother had been treated until now. Lan Xichen would bet that what they had heard had been just the tip of the iceberg, only what the boy himself decided to share with his sister and what she had heard from rumours and her own observations. However, even that fraction of the story would already be enough for Lan Xichen to immediately want to help Wei Wuxian.

Though, given the circumstances, he was not at all sure that the boy in question was ready for the changes which would now come for him. With no one and nothing to believe in in the past when his hopes – if they even existed in the first place, but with Jiang Yanli confirming that he had been hoping to find an easier life in the Cloud Recesses Manor, he believed that the boy could still hope for a better future – had always been cruelly crushed, Wei Wuxian's trust would not be in them from the start. It was probable that he had lived through some similar scenarios more than once in his life.

Lan Xichen could imagine that upon arriving to a new household, he would always hope, not openly of course, and perhaps not even fully consciously. Wei Wuxian would hope to be given a break from his strict discipline and upbringing, from his numerous duties, to be finally given some free time and to be treated with respect and kindness. Even if he would not believe that he would be saved from his position of a servant, surely he must have been looking at other servants in those households and hoping he would at the very least be treated in the same way as them. Not that it had ever happened, Lan Xichen was afraid.

With the situation being like this, it was actually no wonder if the boy did not believe a word of what Lan Xichen had said yesterday in his study. Of course he would doubt that he would not be punished anymore and that his standing in the Cloud Recesses Manor would be not of a personal servant to Lan Wangji but of his companion, meaning being treated like a young master of the Cloud Recesses Manor himself. It must have sounded so outrageous to him that he put no trust in those words.

Lan Xichen realized that they would have to repeat everything several times for him to even start listening to them in earnest. Like this, the boy surely just thought that they were not talking about him. Or even worse, perhaps he was now convinced that they were making fun of him and was warry of them. They truly had to prove to him with actions that everything they had promised was very much real and something Wei Wuxian could and should hope to get.

Now that he was thinking about all of this while watching Lan Wangji leading the boy away from the courtyard – they were walking side by side and it was making Lan Xichen happy that at least this habit of the boy was being slowly broken –, he realized that he knew literally nothing about Wei Wuxian. He had only heard the few facts Jiang Yanli had proposed and what he had deduces from the boy's behaviour. He had to learn more about him to be able to provide help.

Of course, it would be the best if Wei Wuxian would talk to him himself, but that was very unlikely. He knew the boy was terrified of speaking to his believed masters, and of showing any emotions or reactions in general, not only of voicing his thoughts. This being the case, he would just have to get the important information from some other source.

The closest one would be Jiang Yanli, and also other servants in the Lotus Pier Manor when he would go there for the investigation. Who else could help him understand Wei Wuxian? He doubted that the boy had any friends or acquaintances who would know about him not as their servant but as a close enough person so they would be able to shed some light into the boy's inner most thoughts.

He suddenly wondered if Mo Xuanyu could perhaps give him more information. After all, Jiang Yanli had said that her brother had served in the Koi Tower Manor. The timing matched with the period before Lan Xichen had taken Mo Xuanyu away from his family and thus saved him from a fate which was not that far away from Wei Wuxian's. It had also been him who had noticed Wei Wuxian being abused in the Cloud Recesses Manor and had come to talk to Lan Xichen about his suspicion which must have taken a lot of courage seeing that the boy was still very shy and unsure of what he could and could not do.

Lan Xichen would have to get to work soon. First though, he had to warn his uncle to be gentle and thoughtful when approaching Wei Wuxian so all the careful and precious progress would not be wasted with just one of his words or gestures.

He turned away from the window and faced Lan Qiren who was still standing next to him, looking outside even thought there was no one to see there anymore, only the rabbits hopping around without a care in the world. Something, that none of them could afford to do.

Lan Qiren must have realized he was being watched because he slowly turned his head and focused his eyes on his nephew. Lan Xichen was alarmed, his uncle looked like he had suddenly aged by at least ten years. Had this morning's events shaken him this greatly? Or was there any other reason?

Before he could find an answer, Lan Qiren spoke in a low, tired voice: "Xichen, what did you come to talk to me about?"