Won't you believe me? (Servant no more - book 2)

Chapter 83

Wei Wuxian was precariously balancing on the very edge of a cliff. Not literarily of course, in a figurative sense. But the feeling was still the same. The deep abyss he was just about to fall into was looming in front of him, waiting to devour him whole, leaving nothing of his heart and soul behind. There was endless light being emitted from down there and he could not see anything else clearly. He could not tell what was waiting for him under that cliff should he fall.

It was the most terrifying thought, not knowing what was about to happen. All the more that it was in such a moment of inner vulnerability. If anyone ever wanted to shatter Wei Wuxian's soul, this would be the moment. He was sure that if he was to get hurt now, he would never again be able to recover.

That blinding light was all the hope Jiang Yanli had just ignited inside of him. Her insistence that he would never have to go back to the Lotus Pier again had ingrained itself deep in his heart already and it could not be removed anymore. The hope that was brought with it was overwhelming. If it would shatter now, Wei Wuxian's heart and soul would certainly be obliterated together with it, shattered into millions of pieces, never to be put together, never to be restored.

It was so frightening he started trembling all over. He put his hands even closer to his torso, trying desperately to keep himself together, already dreading how awful it would be to fall apart. He was just waiting for the hammer to come down and strike right where he felt the most vulnerable. His past experiences spoke clearly, he would never get anything from hoping, only pain and suffering. He was not allowed to dream and certainly not allowed to want to have his dreams fulfilled.

However, in the Cloud Recesses Manor, everything and everyone were good, and he could not keep himself back. The last drop to the already full cup of hope were Jiang Yanli's words just now.

Truth to be told, the cliff had always been there for Wei Wuxian. The possibility of falling would loom over him, the end near. Falling down from it would without a doubt now have a happy ending. Only this time, it was different. It seemed like the abyss under the cliff was calling for him to jump willingly.

And there was that light. So bright it was hurting his eyes and emitting faint warmth which was extremely soothing, to the point of making all of his worries and nerves go away. It looked and felt almost friendly. And it was calling for Wei Wuxian to come and become one with it. It terrified him to the marrow of his bones. Even if he wanted to come close to that light, there was still the fall from the cliff to worry about.

"Wei Ying..." came a sudden call of his name from the wall of light in front of him. For the brightness was now not only coming from under the cliff but also from all the sides, including from above him.

Even though it had always felt like there was nothing but him, the cliff and the abyss here, at this exact moment, the voice was proving him wrong. He immediately recognized who was calling for him and he relaxed somewhat. He was wondering how it could have happened that his master came here with him this time. Not only that, Lan Wangji seemingly stood right in front of him, inside the light where there should have been nothing but air and an endless fall into the abyss.

Wei Wuxian whipped his head up and was trying to see where Lan Wangji could be. He longed to be able to go join his master and stand by his side. He was thirsting for his soothing and reassuring presence. He wanted Lan Wangji to call him again and say that everything was alright, that he had nothing to worry about or be afraid of. He ached to hear him confirm that what Jiang Yanli had said earlier was the truth. If he would hear it from Lan Wangji's mouth, he would believe it unconditionally.

And perhaps, just perhaps, he would have the courage to reach out into the light and go find his master. As things stood, even though he dearly wanted to get closer to Lan Wangji, there was that abyss between them and the inevitable fall which would end with Wei Wuxian being shattered to pieces on his way down. Only his master could protect him from such a fate.

Then, to Wei Wuxian's endless shock, Lan Wangji echoed just the words he had wanted him to say: "Mn. Wei Ying, you will not be sent back to the Lotus Pier Manor. We will not let the Jiangs force you to go back either. If you want, you can stay here as my friend and part of the Lan family. We will protect you... I will protect you."

The light shone ever brighter as Wei Wuxian immediately believed those words. For what he had just heard were promises his master made to him, and he knew Lan Wangji would never go back on them. The light was now so bright that Wei Wuxian could not see anything anymore. He squinted his eyes against it but refused to close them, still searching for the figure that he wanted to see the most.

Yes, there it was! Exactly where the light was seemingly being emitted from, Wei Wuxian recognized a standing figure in white flowing robes. He would never mistake that person for anyone else, it was his master! All that brightness was actually coming from him as if he was illuminating the way for Wei Wuxian.

And Wei Wuxian did not hesitate for a second. He forgot about there ever being an abyss of despair waiting for him if he took even a half step forward. In his mind, there was no cliff anymore, but a brightly lit path in front of him. At the end of the way, Lan Wangji was waiting for him. Without a second of hesitation, Wei Wuxian all but run to that figure of light and the hope in his chest could not be extinguished anymore. His master was protecting it with his presence, would always protect it.

It was just a small step, such a short distance which had been separating him from Lan Wangji, that he had closed it in a heartbeat. His eyes were completely blinded and he had to blink several times to be able to see again.

Here he was, his perfect, kind and benevolent master. The person which mattered the most to Wei Wuxian in the whole world. He could not help himself but grinning widely like an idiot. He was just too happy at the moment.

He detached his hands from his torso, he did not need to hold himself together anymore. He knew that with his master by his side, he would not shatter for sure. Few things were as certain in this world as the statement that Wei Wuxian believed Lan Wangji's every word.