Won't you believe me? (Servant no more - book 2)

Chapter 85

Jiang Yanli did not know how long she was walking around. Her emotions had been stirred in the best of ways and she could not hold herself back. It was a true miracle that Wei Wuxian was now apparently ready to finally believe everything would change for him, and was even happy because of it. Such a tremendous change could be hardly overlooked even if the signs were small themselves.

Jiang Yanli only hoped there would be no drawbacks for him, it would be devastating if her brother's trust would be broken by accident. For she fully believed the Lans would never allow Wei Wuxian to fall into despair or mistreat him in any way at all. If her brother would regress, it would be solely due to the influence of his own past's demons and surely Lan Wangji would be there to catch him.

She stopped in her tracks, suddenly unsure once again if she could be of any help anymore. There had been a time when she had been all Wei Wuxian had had and she had tried her best to help. However, this did not stand true anymore. Now, there were Lan Wangji, the rest of the Lans and even Mo Xuanyu and A-Yuan by her brother's side. He had so suddenly received so much support that it must have been frightening for him. Not that Jiang Yanli would do anything to change this situation; Wei Wuxian would have to get used to being taken care of and receiving comfort and support freely.

Jiang Yanli rubbed at her eyes again, trying to fruitlessly stop her tears from falling. She felt a little silly to be crying in the middle of a hallway just because she was overwhelmed with happiness and relief for her brother. She tried to calm herself and her hiccupping breathing, if anyone would see her like this, they would wonder what terrible had happened to her.

Just as she thought about this, there came a concerned voice from behind her: "Miss Jiang, is something wrong?"

Jiang Yanli startled a little bit. She had not thought anyone was here with her; she had not heard anyone approaching nor had passed by anyone just now. The person must have been standing behind her, quite close at that, as the voice was coming from that direction. Luckily, they could not see her teary face just yet. Jiang Yanli willed her lips to form into a smile – she could only hope it would look at least a little bit convincing – and turned around to face the other and reassure them she was alright and that there was nothing to worry about.

She lifted her head and trough her tears which were still welling in her eyes blinked at the figure in front of her. She could not recognize the person by sight, but the voice was already familiar to her. It was Mo Xuanyu. From his tone earlier and his outstretched but hesitant hands now, she could tell he was very worried.

She made her best to smile a bit more convincingly and shook her head. She reassured: "No, everything is alright, Young Master Mo. I am just a little emotional and happy that my brother is finally receiving the support he needs to get better."

She was not lying, not entirely anyway. It was true she was over the moon with happiness for her brother. There was however also a small part of her which was still blaming herself for not acting quicker and not having achieved this a long time ago already. So less damage could have been done if she had only been a little braver and reached out to the Lans earlier.

She was sure that if Mo Xuanyu knew what exactly she was thinking, he would try to oppose her and tell her she could not have done anything differently. The boy was so sweet and ready to offer help; help that she did not believe she deserved, not when she had let her brother suffer for so long because of her own cowardice and indecision. However, Mo Xuanyu had apparently not the same understanding of the situation.

A soft 'oh' left his lips and he finally stopped hesitating. He took her hand into his own, running soothing circles on the back of it. He was still worried it would seem and proposed to help: "If Miss Jiang would allow me, why do we not get somewhere less open? I would listen to anything you would like to share."

Jiang Yanli was not shocked as per say, but it was still something new for her to have her feelings taken into consideration. In the past, she had always hidden her emotions in order not to worry Wei Wuxian and not anger her family. Whenever she had let herself show any vulnerability or openness, it would never end well. Just like all those times when she had let her righteous anger and worries get the best of her and stepped up for her brother openly. Or when she had inquired about Wei Wuxian's whereabouts in the Koi Tower Manor and all she had accomplished had been having herself locked under house arrest. She knew from experience that showing any weaknesses or cracks in her mask of an obedient little puppet was not advisable.

However, here was Mo Xuanyu, standing in front of her and instead of taking advantage or her moment of vulnerability, offering her comfort. She realized that she was way too guarded and careful. To be offered a helping hand and comfort, it was something new for her, just like for Wei Wuxian himself.

Had she not told her brother time and time again that he could rely on her for comfort and support? Was not the same now applying for her as well? She should also learn how to accept help, after all, she was not the only one who was fighting for Wei Wuxian anymore.

This invitation was way too sweet to refuse. Although Jiang Yanli was not sure she wanted to talk right now, she still felt it would be better to have some company and not be alone with her inner turmoil. Moreover, Mo Xuanyu was the same as her, he worried about Wei Wuxian greatly and wanted to help him despite not knowing how exactly he should go about it. They could sooth each other and perhaps prepare a plan to make Wei Wuxian relax further in the Cloud Recesses Manor. She nodded, accepting Mo Xuanyu's offer with gratitude.

I am sorry for the messed up uploading schedule these past days. Unfortunately, my Internet is working sporadically at best due to extreme weather conditions :(