THE RETURN

Chapter 44

The ride home was silent, as both adults tried to keep their eyes focused on the road instead of one another. The pure thought of having rougher sex with Elliot was enough to have her panties wet. When they were partners, Elliot had helped her through fantasyland more times than she wanted to admit and truth be told, majority of those fantasies consisted of her being thrown roughly against a wall. Their passion and want for each other to high to take their first time slow. She had been up against the wall once while they were in the shower, before her injuries, however he hadn't really thrown her against it. He had more lifted her and pinned her with his body.

The sound of his throat clearing next to her, had her glancing in his direction. Elliot's eyes always portrayed a story. Whether he was angry, happy, sad or aroused, they always gave him away. The look he held in his eyes at that moment was one of arousal, pure and unadulterated arousal.

She couldn't help the small laugh that escaped her lips, which had his eyes slightly turning towards her. "What are you laughing about?"

She shook her head lightly, "That we're still horny after having sex last night."

He chuckled. With her, his body had began acting like a teenager once again. She didn't even have to do anything for his cock to start stirring in his pants. He was sure it was due to the fact that he had secretly wanted her for twenty years, fantasized about her, and now he finally had her. His body had finally been blessed with being so intimately connected with her and couldn't get over it. "That was last night. It is now this morning. Which means it's perfectly okay for us to want each other again."

"I want you all the time."

"I want you all the time too Liv."

She blew a small breath out of her mouth, "You think it will stay this way? Or will the honeymoon stage disappear eventually?"

The way Olivia Benson viewed love, always made his heart ache. She was forced to grow up in a home where she was never blessed with the feeling of love. As a child of rape, she not only grew up with a mother who could barely stand to look at her but also with a knowledge that her father was a monster. Something that she had thought about herself many times. Her lack of acceptance for love, even now, had him once again wishing that he had pulled his head out of his ass so many years ago. He could of gave her this and so much more if he had only realized the wrong he was doing. He reached his hand across the center console to take ahold of hers, "We love each other honey. We're in love with each other. The honeymoon stage never disappears when the love is true."

She nodded and held on to his hand tighter. She allowed herself a split second to sink into the thought of spending the rest of her life with the man next to her. If they were really about to buy a place together, it was pretty much a done deal but really thinking about it made her nervous. Nervous in a way that she couldn't really explain. She thought on one side she was nervous because she was more than excited to take the next step and on the other side she was nervous because she thought she was going to mess it up somehow. The last thing she needed was her lack of confidence in relationships to get in between her and Elliot. A life with him meant five more kids, three grandchildren and the possibility of more, and a six year Noah who would grow to look at Elliot as not her boyfriend but as a father. It meant a life with someone always by her side. Someone to share her struggles and her joy with. Someone to invest her heart in completely. The deep breath that escaped her lips had Elliot asking her if everything was okay. She smiled and responded, "The honeymoon stage may end because you eventually won't be able to get it up anymore." The look on his face caused her to laugh.

"Oh, so Benson has jokes."

"That's not a joke El, that's just a fact. As a man gets older, he starts losing his ability to achieve and maintain an erection."