What is family?

Chapter 59

Angelina

I turned and tossed around on my bed but sleep was far away from my eyes.

Sigh.

If I can't sleep I start getting hungry after a few hours.

That's one of the major problems with sleepless nights.

Huff.

I couldn't sleep and also my stomach started growling in hunger, so I decided to head to the dining room and get something to eat.

I got off my bed, put on my footwear and went to the dining room.

I was going to open the door of the dining room but my hand halted a few meters away from the handle when I heard someone laughing.

I stood rooted to my place and then a moment later I heard two voices and recognized them as Theo and Anna.

They were talking something and probably Theo is cooking.

I wanted to go in but somehow my body is not moving from the spot.

After a while, I bit my lip, looked one last time at the door and walked away.

After reaching my room, I settled myself near the window and stared aimlessly at the sky and the stars.

What am I doing?

Why am I having all these unnecessary thoughts?

Since when did I start feeling like an intruder in my own house?

I had been so ignorant that I failed to recognize the feelings growing inside me.

I failed to recognize the insecurities that have been subconsciously plaguing my mind.

All these months, I kept on convincing myself that nothing has changed and everything is normal but involuntarily I kept building boundaries around myself each time I felt my brothers are changing slowly.

After speaking to my therapist today and evaluating my thoughts, I finally realized how much things have changed between me and my brothers, especially Theo, Dyl and the twins.

I kept pushing away all the thoughts of their behavior slowly changing because I was scared.

Scared to accept the fact that the truth is indeed bringing about a change.

The most irritating part is that I'm unable to understand if I forced about this change or they did.

I knew the change was inevitable but I kept denying that thought.

I kept denying my own feelings, my own insecurities.

I've been giving myself false hopes of happiness.

No wonder I ended up in a situation like this!

Sigh.

This is the reason I never wanted to try therapy in the first place!

I knew something like this would happen.

I've already experienced it once and now again I'm doing it.

The last time I went to a therapist it ended up with me almost slipping into depression.

Thankfully Vince stopped it before it could escalate into a full blown depression.

But the first time I went to a therapy it did work to an extent and I did overcome some of the issues but unfortunately we had to stop it.

After 5 months of me stopping my last therapy, Vince again proposed me to try it out with Kaylee.