No one else but you (Book 3. of „Only you")

Feeling cold

Narrator POV

Lizzie grabbed Nora's hand which was now cleaned and not covered in dirt and blood how she remembered it. She watched how she stroked her thumb over the back of her hand trying to feel her but the only thing she got welcomed by was a cold lifeless hand.

Lizzie didn't even look up and she already had tears streaming down her face because she won't know if she will ever feel this comforting warmth of Nora's hand. She grabbed her hand tighter remembering what was one of Nora's last words.
„I'm cold." and „Hold my hand... please." these words echoed in her head over and over again.

„You must be freezing... right Nora?" she asked as  she finally looked up to her ex lover. Sobbing left her mouth as she saw how wired up she was.
A bigger tube that is inside her mouth giving her the oxygen she needs because she can't breath alone and multiple other wires attached to her arms and under her medical rope.

A bandage wrapped around her head was the only bandage she could see. The rest was under her clothed body. Multiple cuts in her face from the fists she had to take in from Victor and busted lip as well as black and blue eyes. „I failed I am so sorry." Lizzie cried out as she was trying to catch air.

„I-I couldn't keep you warm. But... I am holding your hand and I wish you would know it. I hope you can feel it. Feel me. Hear me. Because I can't...feel you. Your warmth is not here where it is supposed to be." Her voice was trembling as she stroked the tears away from her face by rubbing her face on her shoulders not wanting to let her cold and pale hand go.

„I have so many emotions rushing through my head and I can't settle for one and focus on it. I used to know what I feel as soon as I could look into your eyes. But now I can't and I know that we aren't a thing but it still feels like a thing and I know it might sound dumb but..." something crawled up to the surface of Lizzie's mind which held her back from saying what she wanted to say. She thought it wouldn't make any sense to say it if she won't be able to respond to it so she decided to say something else instead.

„I will take care of your little rockets. They are devastated just as we all are. Don't leave us like that...please." she begged as she dried her tears off once again.

„I probably won't have a lot of time to come and see you because I will be busy with the kids. But I will try my best to be here as much as I can."

„To be honest I don't even know if I am able to look after them. I don't even get why you wanted me to do it. Beth is way closer connected to them and knows them ever since they where born... you'd probably slap me now because of the way I am doubting myself. I can't replace you as a mother. But I'll try my best to be an addition to it. I'll do it for you until you wake up and until you'll be healthy again." Lizzie told her hopefully as she stroked her hand up and down.

„And we really need to talk about a lot of things when you are back. I didn't just come over to your place to yell at you. I wanted to tell you something important but I guess this has to wait. Because now is not the time for it. At least I think so. I really feel stupid by the way to talk to you and having no reply because I know you always have something to fight back with."

„Excuse me miss. Visiting time is over for now.."
Lizzie heard a nurse from behind and she nod turning her head to the side to let her know that she will get out in a minute.

„I'll be back. I promise." Lizzie kissed the palm of Nora's hand and laid it down gently giving it one last stroke before she leaves.

...

„Will our mom die?" Chase asked doctor Carmack as they where in the lab sitting on turning chairs.
He showed him something under the microscope to pull their attention into something else hoping that the kids will have some time off.

„I think your mom is a really strong woman. She will have a hard way to come back but I think she will. I don't think she will die." he told her and Chase nod lightly still being covered with sadness and concern.

„How do you know?" Quinn asked and Carmack turned his chair towards him.

„I was a military doctor for a couple of years and I saw so many soldiers who lost their life's that where in the exact situation as your mom now. But let me tell you the big difference." the kids listened to him eagerly.

„Nobody made it this far that they survived the operation. Your mom did. She is so strong and she has you both as their guardian angels. You both give her sooo strength." he was able to bring a little smile onto the faces of them and he felt a bit relieved.

„She told us that too one time. That we are her little angels." Chase told him and he smiled down on them.

„See.  All you guys have to do is give her hope and love and then she will be back."

„Will she be back tomorrow?" Chase asked innocently not understanding totally how this works.

So he shook his head as he said „It will take some time until she will be back."

„A long time right?" Quinn asked disappointed and the doc nod.

„Probably yes. But think of it this way. Squirrels take a winter nap for a long time. To Safe up energy and to survive the hard times in the winter right.
So basically your mom is doing a... winter sleep."
He tried to explain them even though it wasn't a winter sleep it was a coma they wouldn't understand it if he would have told them that this way. He didn't lie to them about anything but he over bring the informations a bit lighter and not that harsh.

„Here take this. Each of you gets a little note book from me. You guys will take it home and write something down every day. It doesn't matter what it is. If it's a drawing or a poem you've learned in school or a picture or just how you feel. Write it down until your mom wakes up again and when she does you guys can give her a diary of what great things you've done and she won't feel like she missed out on things."

„Cool this sounds awesome!" Quinn grabbed the note books for both of them.

„Mom will love it. She always loves self made gifts so this is perfect! Thank you Chris!!" Chase got up and hugged him and so did Quinn.