Rudra-Nandani

57 ~ Rudra Wants To Suck

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Nandani POV

"You should change, Rudra, you are wet,"

I tried to say in a slow voice and took a step back to continue.

"Let me get you another pair,"

I said and he lowered his gaze inhaling a deep breath.

I went to the dressing room and brought out the same maroon pair that he took off in the morning and attendees kept it there after washing.

I handed him over and said again.

"Go, change,"

My voice was low, feeling heavy and seeing him crying like that made me really very emotional. He stood up from the couch and I walked closer to him.

"Do you need help?"

I asked and he shook his head washing the fresh tears that rolled down his cheeks.

Even if he denied, I gulped and held his hand.

"Come,"

I walked with him to the inside of the bathing room and helped him sit down on a stool. Bending forward, I held the side of his kurta and swiftly pulled it out through his neck.

He looked at me and I gently pecked his forehead lovingly. He closed his eyes with my touch and I straightened myself to fill a jug with water.

"Was it a pond or river?"

I asked gently pouring the water through the jug. He lowered his face and answered in a slow voice.

"River,"

I filled another jug and poured it empty over his wide shoulders.

"And, what made you think to do that?"

He inhaled a deep breath, heard my question and looked deep into my eyes holding a painful gaze.

"That I am not good for you, for anyone,"

He said and I inhaled deeply to move towards his back and poured another jug of water over his back and gently rubbed his skin.

"And what changed your mind at the last moment?"

I asked and he answered me back in a slow voice.

"That you knew me from the beginning and still loved me. Not for anyone but for you, I have to live,"

His words sent a strong shiver down my spine and fresh tears rolled down my cheeks.

I lowered my gaze and walked a little away turning my face away from him. I burst into silent cries, not letting him hear my pain and emotions.

I felt him standing up from the stool and I tried to calm myself down.

The silence followed for some moments, I did not know what to say. I knew he was in utmost pain. I could not even guess how he must be feeling right now realising the life he lived was false, based on lies and completely opposite of what he thought. His trust broke, his beliefs broke, his everything broke and basically the pillars on which a person makes his life, the past, the beliefs, the facts, the circumstances, everything was just a lie.

I could not even guess what he must be feeling right now. And, realising what he tried to do to himself really shook me to the core. I was expecting anything but not this. But, somewhere I could understand. He had no one, literally no one by his side to live for, the only thing he struggled for, he worked hard and he continued to survive, was the revenge for his father's death. And, after twenty years of his death, suddenly realising that his father was the only culprit, and had heinous intentions towards his own mother and other women, might have shaken him beyond repair, might have pierced his heart in two.