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It had been a couple of days since Alyssa and I came across each other at the mall and since then things haven't gotten any better. I had tried so hard to stay away from drama this summer, only wanting to focus on family and friends. But when Alyssa tried to pick a fight with me in public, that's when I have to step in. I haven't told anyone that I ran into Alyssa, for then they would just make it a big thing and treat me like some baby. I refused to go through that again. I was better off just trying to figure out my feelings on my own without people surrounding me.
A part of me felt bad lying to Eli, for he had been through my side through literally everything. But I couldn't drag him into my problems. Not again. Alyssa hurt him when they came face to face, and the thought of that happening again made me sick to my stomach.
I sucked in a deep breath, rolling out of bed. I needed a distraction. If I kept thinking of Alyssa, my mind would travel to dark places and I would just catch a panic attack which is not what I needed at the moment. So I pulled my hair up into a ponytail and grabbed my phone, playing my workout playlist. Practicing my karate always helped me to calm down whenever my mind traveled to dark places.
Kick after kick was sent to the air as I tried to forget about Alyssa and all the pain and drama she brought into my life.
This was my summer.
She didn't matter.
Just get over her.
But I couldn't get over her. It didn't matter what I did, she would always be stuck in my head. And it made me so angry I could barley even function. My music ceased when my phone began to rang, and I rolled my eyes before answering.
"Hello?"
"Ryles, what're you doing right now?" Eli's voice came through the phone.
"Well I was trying to get a workout in. Why, what's up? You ok?"
"I'm fine. We're all gonna hang out at the waterpark today and I was wondering if you wanted to go or not."
The waterpark? That sounded like a fun little distraction from everything. Plus, I was desperate to show off my new bikini to everyone.
"Sure. Text me the address. I'll be there as soon as I can."
"Ok. Love you."
"Love you too."
I hung up the phone after that, smiling. However when I caught a whiff of what I smelled like after exercising my nose crinkled up and I shook my head. Man was I in desperate need of a shower. Before I did any of that however I made sure to pack my bag, not wanting to get all sweaty and stressed when I got out the shower. When that was done I walked inside the bathroom, closing the door behind me.
********** An hour later I stood in the girls locker room of the waterpark, examining my body in the mirror. It had been so long since I've worn a bikini around anyone. My eating disorder completely ruined my perspective on my self confidence. Now every time I thought of showing a little skin, my stomach would churn and I would be forced to remember what I was like last summer. It sucked, because a few days ago I was so excited to show off my new bikini. Now I felt like I was back to square one.
