Dance For Me

Chapter 27

Lauren

The bed felt empty without Camila now, every time I laid down I just couldn't bare her not being next to me. Thankfully, tonight she was, she finished up in the shower, washing away the ocean from her skin before strolling towards the sheets with a borrowed shirt and pair of underwear from my closet

"Feel better?" I asked, pulling back the covers for her to join me

She smiled vibrantly, her pearly white teeth just visible between her plump lips "Much better, hot water trumps cold any day" I rolled my eyes and laughed "I know you don't agree, but I'm sensitive, I never went in the ocean as a kid"

I cocked a brow "You live in Miami?" I scoffed a little too abruptly "What, you lived under a rock or something?"

She offered me a cold look, her eyes releasing the joy from only a few moments ago "I was never allowed to go to the beach, not my choice little Miss Free Roam"

Suddenly, I felt bad. I lowered my head and sucked my lower lip into my mouth awkwardly while she settled beneath the covers "Sorry" I whispered with a sigh "That was insensitive"

"You didn't know" she smiled, reaching to gently stroke my knuckles "I'm not exactly a talker"

"Well I'm here to listen" I reassured, turning over my palm to hold her hand "It helps to talk, I promise"

Camila nodded and looked on at the TV that played an old episode of Friends "I went to therapy" she admits "Not that I really opened up, I never trusted them and instead ranted about the last book I read" her voice was calm, and she remained looking away "Eventually they told my social worker that it was pointless, I never went back and ended up sitting with my thoughts for years"

"That sucks" I replied "Therapy never really worked for me either, it's hard giving your feelings to someone else"

She nodded and focused intently on the TV as she spoke "I didn't understand my feelings, I think that was the problem" she laughed under her breath "I just didn't get why nobody wanted me, you know?" My cheeks darkened with a painful guilt as I squeezed harder against her warm hand "I tried so hard to be well behaved and quiet like they asked? I always cleaned my room and I always used my manners"

I could feel the heat in her cheeks as her brows began to furrow in thought, her tone growing with a sad passion "I gave up eventually, I realised that it didn't matter how hard I tried to behave, people would still treat me like shit anyway"

Suddenly, I came to a mind blowing conclusion upon hearing those words "That's why you're so quick to get confrontational, right?"

She nodded, clamping her jaw "I like to get there first, not that I can help it anymore? You get to a point where you're just angry at everyone and everything, a single word can dominate your mind" I lowered my gaze and sighed "I try to hold it in, but I just get this surge of energy in my stomach that I can't keep inside"

"You've gotten better lately?" I added

"Yeah" she shrugged "As much as I hate being cheesy, I kind of blame you" finally she glanced across at me, examining my furrowed brows that begged for an answer "Sounds weird but you're like this higher energy that stands above me, you're someone I know is on my side, you criticise me because you want the best for me"

A smile creeped across my lips and I lifted my gaze from the sheets below me "I criticise you because I know you're capable of so much more than your life story" I spoke honestly "I don't try to pretend that I know how you feel, but from my own traumas, I know how hard it is not to allow it to take over"

She smiled back and interlocked our fingers gently "You never stopped being that person for me you know" she hummed "Even when we were arguing, I felt safe whenever you were around. In the studio, when you were being cold and blunt, my heart relaxed, knowing that you would never hurt me"