Alpha's Fallen Angel

Chapter 57-Amara

Training, sleeping, trying to eat. That's what the last week has consisted of. Nothing but toast and peanut butter has appealed to me. Roman at least went and got an herbal ginger tea from Blair so I'm not nauseous all the time from the anxiety.

Anxiety is eating at me, I jump and call my twin blades or dagger to my hand when I hear any kind of noise, thinking it's the alarms signaling an invasion. It makes me just want to train more, and I'm already training morning to night with my dad, Azrael, and Aylin being here. I even sparred with Roman and Seth a couple times when I was feeling restless. Then, I crawl into bed and fall right asleep, sometimes even without a shower, or without Roman there. The last time we even had sex was in the shower while we were in the Underworld.

I've barely talked to Tamisra either, she's unusually sleepy. Even when I'm training, she's snoring in my head and I have to block her out. Something is up, I've had anxiety since my parents died, but never like this. Maybe it's messing with my physical health, and in turn affecting my wolf. Roman even commented that Adonis is worried, which means Roman himself was ready to put me on bedrest and call a pack doctor over.

Despite all that, the excessive training was worth it. My mental shields have stayed intact throughout the day, and I've learned more about what I can do with my magic. Aylin taught me how she incinerated the vampires on the spot, Azrael how to call forth fire and ice from my fingertips, and my dad, well. My dad taught me everything else. He's let me into his mind several times, and there was even a couple times where I managed to break through his mental shields.

The abilities I already knew how to use felt as easy as breathing, it took a fraction of a second for me to strip anyone's senses. Then he taught me how to slow and completely stop time, set up physical shields, become invisible for long periods of time, and manipulate light and dark.

I was ready for Silas to come for me, I was ready for anything the vamps or even the angels had to give me. They just needed to come so I could get this over with.

Currently, I'm laying in bed. Roman is in his office, and I have an hour until training with Aylin starts. I debate on sleeping for another fifteen minutes but decide that would just make me more tired. Ugh. The nausea hits me right on schedule too. I run to the bathroom and puke nothing but bile into the toilet, dry heaving after a few minutes. Goddammit, Roman usually has my ginger tea ready for me as soon as I wake up, which prevents this, but he had said yesterday he used the last of it, and he had to leave early today to meet the Fae army and get them settled in, so he wouldn't be able to get more. I'll have to run to Blair's to get more before training.

I grab my toothbrush and toothpaste, although that has become quite a chore too. I gag every time the toothbrush touches my mouth, it's gotten a little better since I went and got a cinnamon flavored toothpaste instead of the mint, but I still have to talk myself out of puking every time I'm done with just my teeth. I gave up completely on brushing my tongue, that was impossible to do without puking.

As expected, the brush hits my mouth and I gag again. A knock at my door distracts me from the momentous task at hand and Aylin walks in, this isn't unusual, she's been coming to hang out with me while I get ready, and then we portal to the battlefields together.

"You look...unwell" she says, stepping back

"I don't have the plague. The anxiety over all this is killing me slowly." I say, trying again to brush my teeth and gagging but powering through

"Something isn't right" she says

"No shit. I just wish they would come already. My body can't take much more of this" I say, spitting out the toothpaste and hastily rinsing my mouth.