Chapter 68-Roman and Amara

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Roman's POV

I hated battle, but I hated the aftermath even more. I made a list of all the fallen I could identify, so I could visit their families later. The ones I couldn't, their family or packmates who saw them fall would have to report to me, and I'd go from there. Max and Seth took Aston's body to the morgue before we were even back.

Fuck that hurt. My best friend since we were in diapers, the one who evened out mine and Max's broody demeanors with his stupid ass jokes. Gone. Fucking gone. What was the point? The point of all this death and destruction?

I stopped in my tracks, shutting my eyes as they became glossy. His death will gut me until the day I die. The day I die? I'm immortal. Fuck. I could live another thousand years, and I wouldn't have seen him for over nine hundred and fifty of them. How is that fair? And CiCi. I have yet to find anyone who wasn't of Alpha blood, or royalty in Armaros' case, that lived past the first year of their mate dying. But we would do everything in our power to take care of and be there for her regardless. I wouldn't let Aston's favorite part about his life wither away into nothing.

On top of all that, it fucking hurt that I have to think about another Beta. No time would be the right time to ask Max to step up. Couldn't I just retire from the position? Aston was always meant to be my Beta; I had no intention of ever finding another.

"You okay, Alpha?" Lake asks, coming up behind me

"Yeah, I'm good," I say quickly, pulling myself together and turning around.

"We lost five hundred and twelve, Alpha. And we have at least four hundred vampires we can't fit in the cells. King Armaros has offered to take them until they can be trusted." he says

I give him a curt nod. Five hundred and twelve. Considering there were around seven thousand vampires, those numbers weren't terrible, but still. Five hundred and twelve could easily double if they all had mates and children will be orphans, all because one man was power-hungry. On top of the pain and grief their losses will cause their other loved ones.

"Let's gather the vampire bodies and burn them. Samirah has gathered the bodies of her people; any vampires left can now be burned. Then we gather our own, and we'll await each individual family's wish." I respond

"Yes, Alpha. The rest of the pack and I can handle this part; you should go home. You've been out here for hours." Luke says, putting a hand on my shoulder

I sigh. I feel fucking guilty if I'm not out here with them if I'm not personally overseeing this. It feels like one last letdown to the wolves that died if I stop now.

"I will in a few more hours," I say; no, I wasn't ready to go back yet.

Amara's POV

Dr. Crowen had done a quick checkup to ensure both me and the baby were okay, which we were, and I had been with CiCi ever since. She was, understandably, not okay. She would fall asleep for a few minutes, then wake up screaming when she realized she was living her worst nightmare. Finally, Violet and I had convinced her to take something to sleep soundly. How long would she last? The question hung in the air between us.

"Come on, Mara. We both need to eat. She'll be out for a couple hours at least," Violet says, looking at CiCi for a long moment.

The question running through my mind is the same one going through hers. Could we trust CiCi alone if she woke up while we were gone? I hesitate; I don't think I would like the answer.

"Come on, we can come back when we're done," she urges me

I relent, following her out of the room as we go to the dining hall. Everyone except us three, Gemma and Serena, were helping with the cleanup. I had tried to stay and help, but Roman said to go home and be with CiCi and I would visit the families of the dead with him throughout the following week.

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