Chapter 41

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Louis slowly approach Niall's  doorway, feeling his    heart   clench at the sound of the irish men's sobs. He never wanted to hear Niall that upset or heartbroken, it hurt him too much and it didn't make the feeling disappear knowing that he was part of the cause for his best friends tears.

He stepped into Niall's doorway. Guilt creeping in  as he saw Niall crumpled figure on the bed, seeing his back unevenly move up and down with every sob that wracked through his small body.

"Niall?" He called out softly - unsurely, hesitantly taking a step into the boy's room.

"G-go a-away, I-I ju-st w-want to b-e al-lone." He sobbed weakly, though Louis didn't want to leave his best friend  alone, at least not in the state he was in at the moment. Besides he still needed to talk to him about all of this, sort everything out and hopefully fix their friendship which was on the line at the moment.

"No babe... we need to talk about this." He told Niall softly yet sternly, leaning against the doorway, not knowing if he should approach him just yet.

"What is there to talk about Louis?!" He snapped, whipping up onto his feet, eyes filled with hurt. "I don't know anything in my life anymore! Everything I thought I knew has just been a lie. Do you know how that makes me feel? And worst of all to find out my own best friend has slept with the one guy I love more than anything in this world. The one guy who continues to break my heart each day and probably doesn't even love me back. It makes me sick knowing he's touched you the same way he's touched me, it hurts so much. Everything just fucking hurts and I want it to stop. I don't want to hurt" Tears continuously fell from his blue eyes as he spoke, "God I'm so stupid, I knew from the moment I met him he wasn't good for me yet I continued to persuse him because I was so god damn stupid enough to fall for him." He reached for a pillow, gripping it in his dainty hands as he brought it up above his head before slamming it down onto the bed repeatedly. "Everything in my life is falling apart and its all his fault! I don't know what to do anymore"

Louis quickly walked over to the frantic boy, engulfing him into a hug and shushing in his ear, trying to get him to calm down. The second Niall was surrounded by Louis's strong arms, he collapsed into them, turning around and burying his head into Louis's taut chest, sobbing hard as he desperately tried to sob all the hurt, betrayal, and heartache out.

Louis just let him, knowing he needed this before he could do anything else. In a way, this was a form of self healing, and it's the exact thing that Niall needed at the moment.

Louis picked up the sobbing boy into his arms - the boy burying his face into Louis's neck, not making any attempt to move - as Louis sat on the bed, and brought Niall onto his lap, cuddling the lad close to his body as he continuously cried.

"I-I d-don't k-know what to do..." he croaked brokenly, making Louis's heart ache.

"I'm sorry Niall..I never intended to hurt you"

It was silent after that, nothing but the faint sound of Niall's sobs that were slowly - but surely - calming down. Louis didn''t know what else to say,he knew that whatever he said wouldn't make Niall feel any better or comfort him. Nobody likes to hear their best friend has slept with their partner, its disgusting and Louis wouldn't be surprised if Niall cuts him out of his life, he sure as fuck deserves to be. He never intended to hurt Niall, it's the last thing he would do in this world. The blonde boy was a ball sunshine and didn't deserve anything but happiness in his life and to see him this upset hurt Louis.

"I can explain all of this Niall I swear" He says once there was nothing left but ragged breathing and small sniffles here and there from Niall. Louis could feel the occasional tear trickle down the small boy's face, but he was no longer sobbing.

"I don't want to hear it" Niall says, shaking his head.

"I want to fix our friendship" Louis says "I don't want to lose you as a friend Niall, our friendship means everything to me"

When Niall says nothing Louis sighs but decides if Niall isn't willing to hear him out, he will make him listen.

"We met a few months after I had been kicked out by my parents. Durin-"

"I dont want t-" Niall tries to say but Louis is quick to cut him off

"I know you don't want to hear it but you need to understand the full story" Louis says sternly and Niall stays silent.

"During those few months I had become homeless and due to havinng no money I became a cam boy. that helped me a lot, money was coming through, I had brought myself a place to live and soon enough everything in my life was stable" Louis explains "Liam at the time was looking for a sub, and he had come across one of my cam shows. He messaged me and we met up. He gave me a proposition. He would pay me to be his sub. he was offering a lot and you have to understand Niall I needed the extra money so I agreeded"

"I don't care" Niall says leaving Louis embrace, starting to get up from the bed. He wipes his eyes and picks up a sweater from the floor, slipping it on.

"You know that's not true" Louis says watching Niall curiously. He was far too calm for Louis liking and that was never a good sign. He'll much rather preferr Niall yell at him then ignore the situation and pretending that he doesn't care.

"Where are you going?" Louis asks when Niall reaches for the door.

"Anywhere but here"

Sorry for overdue update but new story pillowtalk is up so check it out if you wanna. Love you xx

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