A Pirate Tail

Party

(This is part of the stupid tale of how Lucy was captured right under a drunk Natsu's nose. WARNING: THIS IS AN AMAZINGLY STUPID STORY OF THE MANY DRUNK AND IDIOTIC MEMBERS OF FAIRY TAIL, DON'T SAY I DIDN'T WARN YOU.)

(Grey's P.o.V.)

"Huzzah!" I cheered happily. "Man, I've had 5 glasses but I'm still thirsty."

"Here you go!" Mira smiled as she passed by, handing a glass. "It's a Bloody Mary though, so be careful."

"Hmmph, as if those things could beat me." I smirked. I really didn't know what I was thinking at the time, and you've probably realized that I was bit tipsy. But I didn't know I was drunk and stupid enough to try and down those things in a single swallow like Cana.

"YEOW!!!" I screeched. "AYAYAY!!"

"Hey look." Natsu snickered. "Grey's turned into a monkey."
Everybody had a good roar at that.

"It burns.." I moaned, tears coming to my eyes. And then, literly, I saw stars and laughing  Happy's (don't ask) swarming me. "Oh my god, I'm gonna-" I'd barely reached over to the side when I saw the same Bloody Mary I had swallowed spill over the ship, along with any other foods I hadn't digested.

"My, my." Mira said walking over. "What a waste of alcohol."

In about 15 minutes, Gajeel and Levy were karaoking some song, Natsu, Lucy, Happy, Erza, Laxus, Mira, Juvia, Jet, Freed, and I (again, don't ask) were doing eye-high leg kicks while in a line to some jazz tune, Elfman was talking to the moon, Evergreen, Panther Lily, and Cana were in a drinking match,
and Mira was, well, just herself really.

But really, the worst was yet to come.

Later on, a bunch of other pirate crews, like Saber Tooth and Lamia Scales came along as Natsu had invited them while tipsy, and the night got a whole lot wilder.

For one thing, I kissed Lyon.

Or I thought I did, thanks to Juvia.

Here's what happened. Lyon was never the type to really party and was just sitting down at a table with me on the other side. Apparently, I was really annoying because I kept on rambling nonsense things while downing a bunch of beer. It was really ticking off Lyon how I kept talking nonstop thanks to the alcohol. Now, apparently, I was too careless and spilled a cup of beer on him, and then he really had it. He literally smacked his hand across my mouth and said threateningly, "If you don't shut up, I'll make you shut up."

Okay, for anybody dirty-minded right there, NO, he didn't mean it like that, he meant 'freeze your mouth shut' shut up way.

Now, for me, drunk, dizzy, delusional, I didn't really know what was going on. All I knew was something warm and moist (you know, because of the beer spill) was covering my mouth, and Juvia behind me kept screaming, "Boy love, boy love! They're kissing!" And I was like "wha?" And then Lyon was saying something about shutting me up, and then it kinda clicked. So I pushed back as hard as I could, tripped, and scrambled up. So what happened was that when I pushed Lyon's arm away, he hit himself on the lip. So when I looked at him, he was wiping his mouth, and then, you know, I sorta took it the wrong way.

"You gay! Oh my Mavis! What the heck did you do?"

"What do ya mean gay? It's because you were a stupid drunkard and was annoying!"

"That's not an excuse to, to do something like that."

"My god, it wasn't that big, watcha talkin' about?!"

So poor, confused Lyon had no idea I was under the impression that he had kissed me, when he had simply tried to shut me up by threatening to seal my mouth with ice which a good friend should do.

"Geez, ya stupid drunk, get a hold of yourself, if you can't think straight then don't think at all. Simmer down before you break something, again."

"I know what happened, and I'm pissed!"

"Well then, come at me, let's see if you can really fight!"

"Ice-make spears!" I cried, hurling it towards him.

"Ice-make shield!" Ice-make arrows!"

I dodged as a hurricane of frozen arrows hurdled towards me.

"Ice-make ice geyser!" I hit the ground with my hands, letting the freezing attack hit him.

"Ice-make floor!" Lyon quickly counter-acted and rolled out of the way.

"Are you really gay Lyon?" I yelled at him.

"What are you talking about, you weirdo!" Lyon yelled back.

"You freakin' kissed me!" I replied.

"What are you talking about? All I did was smack my hand across your mouth."

"What?" I stopped my next attack, and scratched my head. "But-" And then it all pieced together, what the warm and moist thing was, Juvia's usual over reactions, the shut up thing.

"I need to rest for a moment." I said. And then I passed out.

(Natsu's P.o.V .)

"Oi, suppose he's alright?" Sting asked leaning over Grey.

"Ya, he doesn't go down easy." I snickered. "I can't believe that he thought Lyon kissed him. I'm going to die from laughter."

"Please don't." Sting rolled his eyes.

Everybody was crowding around the knocked-out figure of Gray except Juvia, who was cradling him on her lap.

"There, there, Juvia will make everything okay." She cooed. "Juvia will make everything okay."

"I kind of feel sorry for him." Rogue lamented. "Being constantly mothered..." He shivered  and looked around nervously. "Minerva liked to take that role."

"Oh, don't even remind me." Sting shivered.

"That's really relatable with Erza and Mira." Natsu sympathized.

"Hey, imagine if Erza, Mira, and our lady teamed up to take over the world." Sting asked worriedly.

We all felt an eletric sense flash through our spines.

"Hey where are the trio anyway?"

(Omg, I'm dying. I literlly dying (not really) but I have discovered.... Miraculuos Ladybug! I have just started it but I'm already waiting for the next episode. And I can kinda troll considering I can just watch the Korean version without subs considering, you know, I'm Korean. I'm so happy! I love it! Love it, love it, love it!!!!! Ladynoir all the way. Talk to me if you want to fangirl with me too. BYE!)