fostered ; e.d

{ 24 }

ethan dolan

"There's some cookies and chips on the counter if you want some fatass" I said laughing at myself.

"Ethan I'm done with you! Just shut your mouth and deal with your bitch of a girlfriend." She made a plate of dinner for herself.

"Oh and like your boyfriend isn't a dick himself." I walked around the island.

"How the hell is he a dick? You've never talked to him." She looked at me across the kitchen.

"Whatever. It's useless talking to you." I rolled my eyes.

"No, Ethan. Tell me, why do you hate him? Why do you think he's a dick. Cause he's such a sweet guy and he's super caring"

I couldn't tell her that I had a crush on her.

"I know." I walked closer to me. "I fucking know he's just not right for you" He put his finger on my chest.

"You don't know anything about me" She slapped my hand away from her. "You don't know anything about me and him and you'll never try to learn. You just want everything to be perfect in your eyes. You don't want me here, you don't want Shawn here, you don't want anything to do with a foster." She grew more mad.

And with that, she grabbed her food and walked back up the stairs to her room.

I groaned and put my elbows on the kitchen island as I groaned into my hands.

I let out a big sigh and walked outside. I made my way around the house until I got to the gate. I jumped on it and got onto the roof. I sat on the top looking at the sunset.

I didn't want to even see Jordyn right now. I was to the point where I couldn't take seeing her without wanting to kiss her, but I forced myself to be a dick to her so I wouldn't rat myself out.

I looked over and I saw Grayson coming onto the roof to sit next to me.

"I heard what you said to Jordyn." He put his arm on my back.

"I know, I don't need another lecture from you. I'm trying to get her out of my head, but every time I see her, I think of her and Shawn and how I want to be him. I'm trying to get over her" I yelled.

"Hey chill, I'm not yelling at you" He put his hand on my shoulder.

"I don't want to go to juvie" I put my hands over my eyes and started to cry from being so overwhelmed.

"It's okay."

"I don't want to like her. I don't want to go to juvie. Last time I went through this the cops showed up and everything. I don't want to go through this again." I looked up.

"Bro, it's going to be okay"

"No, it won't. I'm going to go through the same shit. I'm going to be used again and I'm just going to fuck up again."

"No, you won't. Jordyn isn't like Josie. She isn't bad and she won't get any of us in trouble. Josie was reckless and blamed you for things you didn't even do."

"But I took the blame cause I thought I loved her. I'm going to do the same exact thing with Jordyn and I'm going to go to juvie for it."

"No, Jordyn isn't like her. Josie stole alcohol and made you drink some. She got you drunk so she could take your money and mom's ID to buy more alcohol. She blamed you for things you didn't do and she convinced you to own up to the blame every single time. Jordyn would never do that. She's smart and responsible, she would never put the blame on you and she would never do those things to make us look bad. She's a good girl."

"I just don't want to get caught up with this shit anymore."

"I know." He placed his hand on my shoulder.

Somehow I need to forget about Jordyn. This dating shit isn't even helping. I need to actually fall in love with Elizabeth.

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