Pirates of the Caribbean Oneshots

A Talk About Avoiding Children

"Jack."

That one word was enough to stop thirteen year old Jack Sparrow in his tracks.

His father rarely called him "Jack" , both his parents preferring the nickname of  "Jackie" , which was thier usual form of address for him.

He slowly turned to face Captain Teague, crossing his arms and arching an eyebrow.

"What?"

Teague's dark eyes narrowed as he beckoned him closer, laying a hand on his guitar strings to silence the instrument.

"I hear you've been courting Mrs McCullough's lass."

Jack nodded once.

"Have ye done...more than kissing?" Teague asked.

"What else would I be doing?" Jack wondered, his expression blank.

Teague snorted.
"Don't act innocent with me boy. Have you gone further?"

"Yes, but she agreed! I didn't...I'd never..." Jack broke off, looking panicked.

"I'm not accusing you of anything. Did you use contraception?"

"What?" said Jack.

"Plan it around her fluxes or use barriers?"

"Barriers?" Jack repeated.

Teague rolled his eyes and searched through his coat pockets, finally pulling out a sheath, which he passed to his son.

"You'll figure out how to use it. However, you're living proof that contraception doesn't always work."

Jack looked up, his eyes wide with shock.

"I'm joking. When we conceived you, contraception was the last thing on our minds."

Jack stared at the sheath again, then shoved it into his breeches pocket.

Teague ruffled his dreadlocks in a rare display of affection.
"Off you go, and don't dare make me a grandfather until I'm at least fifty."

Jack just flashed him a cheeky grin as he jogged away.

"I'll make no promises!" he called over his shoulder, shaking his dreadlocks back into place.

"You're an asshole, Jackie!" Teague retorted lightly as he swung his feet off the table to stand up.

He deserved a drink... and some fun with Roxanne...

A/N Comment? Pretty please?