F.A.M.E.

Need You

Deanna POV-

After class I decided to just spend the night with Anais. I didn't feel like driving back home. Nor did I feel like dealing with anybody. Or maybe I was avoiding Shep.

He probably hated me as much as his fans on social media, even though he said he didn't. I just didn't believe that.

Anais's roommate had actually dropped out, so she had this extra bed just there. She said I could sleep in it anytime.

"Beige-nets." Anais said smacking on some beignets, we got from this cafe.

"Its beignets. Pronounced-Ben-yay." I laughed, putting on my scarf getting ready for bed.

"Why yall Louisiana people gotta make shit so complicated. The sign said beige-nets." She said smacking. "Call it like it sound."

"Oh my God." I laughed. "Its French."

"Newsflash negro, we in America. Not France. If I want the beignets I'll go to France. But right now, these beige-nets is cracking. What's that restaurant in New Orleans that got them?"

"Cafe Du Monde."

"Yassss bitch. When I go visit you over Christmas break we gotta go. These beige-nets is good as hell." She said smacking.

I just laughed and shook my head, and sat on the bed, reading my history book.

There was a knock at the door.

Anais got up to get it. It was Shep. He came in and looked at me.

I looked down at my book. Anais closed the door.

"What y'all doing?" He looked at us. I tried to avoid looking at him.

"Eating some beige-nets." Anais said with her mouth full.

"Beige-nets?" He said confused.

"Yeah these donut thingys." She handed him the bag to see if he wanted some.

He looked in the bag. "You mean beignets?"

"In America we call them beige-nets."

He shook his head and smirked sitting on the bed I was on.

"Ain't that what you made baby, when I came to visit you that time when you was still in Baton Rouge?" He looked at me.

"Yeah." I looked at him quickly then back down my book like I was reading.

I felt like he came to break up with me, which made me want to cry, but I was trying to hold it together.

"I'll let y'all have your moment." Anais left out the room.

"So you ain't gon show your baby love or nothing? I just come in and can't get no kiss or nothing?" He looked me.

I quickly pecked his lips, then went back to my book.

He stale faced me. "So everybody abandoning me, and you are too?"

"No, I just didn't think you wanted anything to do with me." I felt my eyes water. I wiped the tears away.

"Why would you think that?"

"I ruined your life." I wiped the tears away.

"Did I tell you that?" He asked me.

"No but Toya did and your fans." I started to cry. "And the fans send me hateful messages, saying I was a slut who was coming on to TD and only made that story to save myself and ruin you."

"First off, Fuck Toya. And anybody that does that to you, is not a fan of mine. Real fans don't do that. I don't blame you for anything. I did what I did to TD, not you.

And the Giants let me go. Yeah. But my life is not ruined. Either another team will pick me up or I'll find another direction. That's what my life has been about- finding ways. My mother taught me that. My dad died, she was a single mother raising us. She always found a way, even when there wasn't one. And I will too. Hell, I might even enroll in Rutgers and go for my Masters in something. But my life is not ruined okay?"

"Yeah." I wiped my eyes.

"But it will be if you abandon me. It will be if you stop talking to me, kissing me and telling me that you love me. It will be, if you not next to me at night. It will be, if you allow this to bring us further apart rather than together.

I need you. Not Toya. Not them fake fans. I need my tat-twin, who window I used to sneak in back in Baton Rouge like I was some 12 year old boy. My tat-twin who made me make a decision to settle down, because I didn't want to lose her. I sacrificed a lot of Bianca clones for you lil girl."

I let out a slight smile. He smirked.

"You gon stop avoiding me?" He asked.

"Yeah."

"I love you." He said.

"Love you more." I said.

"Can you show me that? Dang."

I giggled, then gave him a huge hug and kissed all over his face. He startled tickling me and somehow he ended up on top of me staring down at me.

He bent down and kissed me. I softly grabbed the sides of his face and began to kiss him further.

"I know yall is not about to have sex in my room." Anais walked in. "Funkying up my beige-nets."

Shep laid down next to me and wrapped his arms around me, placing a kiss on my neck.

"Can I stay with Anna tonight Anais?" He asked.

"Yes, as long as y'all don't be getting freaky. Can't nobody have sex in this room, but me and my Red." She said getting in bed. "And Dr. Jennings when he stop playing and give me the D."

I bust out laughing.

"I don't want to hear that." Shep said disgusted.

"This is my room. So you will deal." She said getting in her bed and turning off the light.

Shep intertwined his legs and hands with mine.

I felt water droplets on my face in the darkness.

I guess him finally being here next to me, he felt safe enough to release how he was really feeling. I could only imagine how Toya would treat him, if he showed a weakness.

I turned to him in the darkness and kissed his lips.

"I just need you." He said with his voice cracking softly. Trying not to disturb Anais.

"I am here and God is too.  2 Corinthians 12: 9. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me."

I kissed his forehead, and brought him closer to me to lay his head on my chest. I held him to reassure him I was there and we drifted off to sleep.

Please look at this fool when he imitates Ezekiel Elliot. I cackled so hard. Its at 1:43. Also the pro-bowl game with him, Landon, and other NFL players across the league comes on tonight on ESPN. Tune in.