Sean and Mark looked at each other, scared, neither entirely sure what was to happen next. Sean's Ma was still staring calmly at the two of them, sipping her coffee, with one eyebrow raised.
"Um..." Mark broke the silence, shifting his weight from foot to foot. "I...I'm pretty sure we're both quite gay." Sean looked at him, his mind screaming, "MATE WHAT THE FUCK YOU AT."
"Quite gay." His Ma repeated. Sean glanced at Mark again, having absolutely no fucking clue what to say.
"Um...yeah. Just a little though." He ended up saying, cringing internally immediately after.
"Ahhh, yes. You little bit gay people." His Ma said, swirling her cup around before looking up at him sassily. Sean felt like running out of the house with a ruler, screaming, "HELLO, THIS IS WHAT I AM, STRAIGHT. YES."
Instead, he ended up doing the same thing to his Ma with the first object he picked up.
His plans to say he's much no homo failed.
He ended up grabbing a banana, (his first mistake), and jumping on Mark, screaming, "HELLO, THIS IS WHY I AM NOT STRAIGHT, YES." while brandishing the banana.
His Ma got up from her chair with a sigh, and pinched the bridge of her nose, while Mark stared at Sean, with his most: 'What the fuck was that!?' look. Sean shrugged helplessly in response, and pointed hurriedly at his Ma, awaiting her judgement.
"Well..." His Ma began saying. "I suppose I should have guessed when I found a dick pic from Felix on your phone. Three years ago."
"What!?" Sean and Mark exclaimed at the same time, in equal astonishment.
Sean's Ma dumped her mug in the sink, and swiftly exited the room, peering back in and saying, "Toodles!" Before her footsteps were heard heading back upstairs.
"That...was unexpected." Sean said, stating the fucking obvious.
"YOU DON'T FUCKING SAY!" Mark said, calmly, like Dumbledore.
Sean smiled uneasily at Marks face, in all its angriness. "Oh look! I gotta go...." Sean looked around frantically, searching for an escape. "Brush my teeth! Yes! Brush my teeth....its an important part of my day." He cheered, grabbing a cactus, and running from the room.
YOU ARE READING
Kik Me, I'm Irish
FanfictionThe typical septiplier Kik story. Yay! ~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~ Mark is a regular bully to anyone he defines as 'different' in his school. He is mean to everyone, and rude. He goes on Kik nearly every day. Sean is a regular victim in his school. His glasses...
