im a fucker and dont care/ rambling

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....

Why? Why?

I don't matter. I know i dont matter deep inside. I purely know it and how it feels as I think someone irl is trying to save me but seems to turn it back on to there self's and in the end I save them. Again.
Where in my story am I going to get saved? Never. That's when. Because I don't deserve saving.

I can't.

I can't do it.

I don't want to be awake anymore.

It is selfish? Fine

I'm overdramatic? Yup. Always.

Bluntly can say I want to slit my wrists and gets laughed at.

My life is a full joke.

Let's all laugh

*Sighs* I'm treated in the most coldest ways and...I can't.

I am replaceable. Honestly. Replaced in a second.

Can't you see that? I can.

I can see the uglyness. I can see the fear. I see the pain. I can't see anything but flaws and reasons to go.

I want the pain to go away...I want it all to go away.

I'm alone, crying twelve in the morning like a little greedy child.

That is all I am

My mother is so loving but oh so hateful at the same time. How can that happen? Fucking bitch.

I can't wrap my head around things.

My thoughts are scattered. No one is just...there...I should vent personally but I'm a fuck up either way.

Oh God ...what is wrong with me? 

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