Janet's P.O.V
"What's this?" I looked down in Denzel's hands to see him holding the bipolar disorder medication his doctor had prescribed for him.
My mind went blank not knowing what to tell him. I knew that I had to be honest, but this was hard.
"Zyprexa? Risperidone? Baby, are you sick?" He looked at me with eyes that laced with concern.
He clearly didn't read the name on the bag. He continued on as he looked at the side of the bottle.
"It's not mine. It's for you."
"Side effects of Zyprexa include weight gain, increased appetite; headache, dizziness, drowsiness, feeling tired or restless; memory problems; stomach pain, constipation, loss of bladder control; back pain, pain in your arms or legs; numbness or tingly feeling. What the fuck? You think I'm taking this?"
"You have to take it, Denzel."
"Why? I thought I made it very clear in the hospital that I wasn't suicidal. Now they prescribe me some fucking medicine that I'm supposed to take everyday? I'm not taking this shit. I feel fine."
It was clear that he wasn't sober. But I took this as my opportunity to tell him. Hopefully he'd understand.
"Denzel, baby you have to take this medicine because you were diagnosed with bipolar disorder in the hospital."
I looked at him waiting to see his reaction. I was afraid as to how he'd react. He stared at me blankly as he looked down at the medicine again. It was as if something was starting to click with him.
"That's what you were keeping from me this whole time? You fought with me over what all because you wanted to keep me in the dark?"
I walked over to him and put my hand on his face trying to get him to see things my way.
"It wasn't like that. I swear it wasn't. I was going to tell you."
"Don't." Denzel moved my hand off his face. "You weren't going to tell me. How long were you going to keep this a secret? Were you just gone not tell me at all, or were you gone take it to your grave?"
"See, this is why I hid it for so long. I knew you'd react this way. I didn't do this to hurt you. Please, you've got to understand that I love you baby."
"Understand? Understand what? We're in a relationship and you can't even be honest with me. If I would have never found this medicine you would have never told me. The point is that you should have told me. You don't keep shit like this from me!"
Denzel paced the floor back and forth as he threw the medicine. Tears came to my eyes seeing him this way. I was now starting to see that side of him that I was always afraid of.
"I only kept it a secret because I'm tired of seeing you hurt. We were just getting in a place where you could finally smile again. I didn't need anything to push you over the edge again. Denzel, I just almost lost you. Do you know how devastating that was for me? I didn't even have time to process what was happening all I knew was that I had to get you down off that bridge. Baby, I need you to understand that I'm always going to do what I think is best for you. I know that I should have told you sooner, but I wanted you to be happy for as long as you could without anything ruining it. You've got to believe that."
Denzel took a seat on the edge of the bed putting his head in his hands as he rocked back and forth. I walked over to him, and sat on the edge of the bed beside him. I brushed my hand softly across his head as the tears that were in my eyes fell down my face. Seeing him this way hurt like hell. I put my head on his as I cried.
