Chapter 16

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Charming & Rumple

Charming: Hey, have you seen Henry?

Rumple: Not lately, why? Is something wrong? Did that damned pirate give him weed brownies again?!

Charming: No no, he's just run off with some girl.

Rumple: Oh no…

Charming: What?

Rumple: He's begun dating already. You know how the men of this family are with women.

Charming: Yeah, I know. He's going to suffer through some abuse before he gets the girl.

Rumple: Oh yes. I just hope it isn't too bad. He's still young.

Charming: Maybe we should have a talk with him.

Rumple: Does Regina know he's off with a girl?

Charming: Yes.

Rumple: There is no hope for the boy.

Charming: What do you mean?

Rumple: That evil panda will eat her young.

Charming: She wouldn't hurt Henry…would she?

Rumple: I believe she'd use magic on him, like she's already done.

Charming: You have a point. We better find him before she does.

Rumple: I think I know exactly where he is.

Charming: I'll meet you at your shop then.

Rumple: Hurry!

Cora, Emma & Snow:

Cora: Still haven't found Henry yet?

Snow: No. You know where he is, don't you?

Cora: Possibly.

Emma: That's why you didn't add Regina to the group text. Where is he, Cora?!

Cora: Temper blondie. And in due time, you'll find him. Until then, let him enjoy his date.

Emma: He's THIRTEEN! He doesn't need a date, he needs a damn book!

Snow: Well, he had a book and you see what happened when he read it…

Cora: Exactly. Thank you snowflake.

Emma: So you'd prefer him to not enjoy his childhood, because believe it or not he is still a child, than to read or go out and hang with his friends?

Snow: No one is saying he isn't a child. Just that, he should stay away from books awhile until he matures a little bit.

Cora: What if everything in that book wasn't real? Would you think he was mentally stable then? Or would you just call him overly-imaginative? Either way, he needs to find something else to occupy his time. Bottom line: The boy is strange and he takes after your side of the family!

Emma: I guess. I'll talk to him…Hopefully before Regina gets hold of him.

Snow: Excuse you Cora! Our side of the family isn't strange! Your family are the ones who kill because it suits your fancy!

Cora: DAMN STRAIGHT SNOWFLAKE! And I'm feeling the temptation to kill AGAIN so don't tempt me!

Emma: Oh God…I'm just going to go find the kid. You two have fun.

Snow: DO IT! I have an arrow with your name written on it! I'll shoot your ass in 2.5 seconds!

Cora: Don't make me piss myself laughing!

Snow: You'd piss yourself sneezing, old ass bat.

Cora: …You did not…

Snow: Oh but I did.

Cora: You. Are. Dead. Meat.

Snow: Bring it on.

Henry & Erin

Henry: I had a lot of fun on my date with you.

Erin: I did too. I'm sad it had to end though.

Henry: Don't worry, we can hang out again this weekend, if you want.

Erin: I would love too!

Henry: Cool. We'll go wherever you want.

Erin: I want to come to your house.

Henry: Okay, I think I can swing that.

Erin: And have dinner with your parents.

Henry: WAIT WHAT

Erin: I want to meet your family.

Henry: No you don't!

Erin: Yes I do! Henry, you don't have to protect me.

Henry: Yes I do! My mom is crazy. And you know I'm not exaggerating!

Erin: I know but maybe if we sit down and talk like normal people, she might actually like me.

Henry: THEY AREN'T NORMAL.

Erin: I'm not changing my mind.

Henry: Alright Erin, if that's what you really want to do, I'll set it up.

Erin: Thank you Henry!

Henry: PLEASE CHANGE YOUR MIND!

Erin: Not happening! See you this weekend!

Henry: Yeah, see you at my funeral.

Regina & Belle

Regina: Bookworm, I need your help.

Belle: You know my name, use it.

Regina: Fine. Belle, I need your help.

Belle: Thank you. Now what is it?

Regina: I need a certain book.

Belle: Alright, what's the title of the book.

Regina: I don't know the title but I need something that will give me advice on how to be open to Henry dating.

Belle: I see, well I have some good news and bad news.

Regina: What's the good news?

Belle: That Henry dating is normal.

Regina: Then what's the bad news?

Belle: That kind of book doesn't exist because he's thirteen and shouldn't be dating at that age.

Regina: Wait, but you just said it's normal.

Belle: Yes, in today's society it is normal.

Regina: I knew I was right to be upset!

Belle: Children are growing up too fast, they should be enjoying the only childhood they get.

Regina: YES! Finally we agree on something!

Belle: I think if you just calmly tell Henry to focus on school instead of having a girlfriend, maybe he'll understand.

Regina: Calm…Right. I can be calm.

Belle: Drink a glass of wine before you do.

Regina: Okay, I'll drink a bottle of wine before I do.

Belle: I said GLASS.

Regina: A bottle, I got it.

Belle: Oh dear...

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