The Holt Conundrum

first september

It's September and I need a roommate. I couldn't live in the dorms anymore. I was fed up of being paired with idiots. I was done sharing my kitchen and my bathroom with an entire floor. When I signed the lease for my apartment, I did it with the guy I was seeing at the time. Turned out he was as unreliable as he was loud in bed. Which was very.

So here I am, alone in an apartment I can't afford, force to put up ads for a room to rent.

I talk with a couple of people, but they all sound shady. Then there's this guy that messages me and sounds alright so I tell him to come look at the place.

I want to be a picky queen but I know that I can't afford it. I need to find someone fast. I've already had to pay for July and August on my own. I don't want to pay for September too.

You know when you see someone for the first time and you think that those clothes they're wearing really are appalling and that they should immediately remove them, any type of clothing really, well that's the first thing that crosses my mind when I first meet Holt.

I think about Xander in Buffy saying that Spike is compact but well muscled. That's what that dude is. He's not buff, but I can tell under that shirt he means business.

And I should also be thinking business.

I give him the tour of the apartment, show him the room that could be his. It's smaller than mine, but it's my apartment.

I lower the price of the rent a bit, because he'll get the smaller room beside the bathroom and because he's hot.

He looks like he's ready to sign whatever I'll tell him to sign. He also seems a little bit shy and awkward. I think it's adorable. And I also think I need to make him even more uncomfortable.

"Before you say yes to moving in, I prefer to tell you I'm gay. I know some people aren't okay with that," because apparently we're still in medieval time and we settle matters with duels and we have no idea what personal hygiene means. Seriously, you can Uber food to your freaking front door, while sending a drone to kill someone half way across the world, but we're still concerned about who fucks who? Humans disgust me sometimes. "And I will probably be bringing boys back to our apartment, so I prefer telling you right away if that's something that could change your mind."

He doesn't make a face or look shock. I like that dude. "Oh, I don't mind. I'm straight, but it's fine if you're gay. As long as you like, don't try to look at me while I shower," he says and chuckles softly, like he's trying to be funny, but worried he might not be allowed to say jokes.

It makes no sense. Clearly, this dude has no self esteem, but he's like especially hot. He's so hot that even if he's not my usual type, I would totally take him up against the fridge, even if there should be no sex in common areas—that's a rule. I have rules. I'm a queen, fuck everyone else.