Flights // Billie Eilish

Chapter 48

Josies POV

I sat with wide eyes trying to figure out if my mind was playing tricks on me, not fully believing my eyes.

Billie stood with an unreadable facial expression across her face.

"W-what are you doing here?" I asked in shock as I stood up.

"I had to see you." She said seriously, refusing to break our eye contact.

I was speechless. I didn't know what to say, what to do, how I even felt. A part of me wanted nothing more than to run into her arms and the other part of me wanted to show her to the door.

"I thought tour wasn't over for another week?" I continued to question her since I was completely flabbergasted.

"It isn't. I told Dani I had to bail on the last week."

"Why would you do that?" I raised a brow.

"Josie-" She took a step towards me.

I immediately took a step back as she tried to get closer to me earning a hurt look from her.

"Can we please just talk about everything?" She spoke carefully.

I took a second to debate what I should do, still having an internal battle with myself on how I feel right now.

"C'mon Josie, ten minutes. After that you decide what you wanna to do. If you decide you never want to see me again, although that'll fucking kill me," she looked down at her feet with sad eyes, "If that's what you really want then that's what you'll get. I promise."

My heart ached at her words.

I nodded slowly as I sat back down on the couch, her joining me this time. She kept a comfortable distance from me, knowing she shouldn't push her luck right now.

"Fuck Josie, I don't even know where to start. I'm just so sorry." She shook her head as I saw her eyes gloss over.

Was Billie going to cry? I've never seen her cry before and I never wanted to. I wasn't sure I'd be able to handle seeing her so vulnerable.

I didn't say anything.

"Danielle and I are not and never have been together, I swear dude. She is like my sister, I thought you knew that."

"I did, but when I saw all the rumors and how close the two of you got during tour- and then you bailed on the green carpet, when you promised me that you'd be there no matter what, with no explanation at all. I just don't know what you expected me to think?"

"You're right. I know I could've done more to show you how much I care about you while I've been away which could've prevented all of this. I just get so caught up in tour and everything."

"I know you do. It's not your fault. That's what you were born to do, that's when you're happiest. When you're doing shows every night and-" I said quietly.

"No it's not." She cut me off.

I furrowed my eyebrows at her words.

"I'm happiest when I'm with you Josie. That's why I'm here right now with you, not on tour. I have been a fucking mess without you." She said as she looked at me with a serious expression making my heart skip a beat.

I wanted to forgive her right then and there, but I couldn't. I needed answers. I've spent days tearing myself apart over this.

"But what happened the other day? Why didn't you come? You knew how important that night was to me." My voice cracked as I finished my sentence.