Always

Chapter 77

"What the hell are you talking about? You aren't moving out! Why would you say that?" He grabbed my hand again, forcing it into his own, while his other grabbed my jaw and forced me to look him the eye. "You asked me for my honest thoughts. I'm kind of going crazy right now y/n. I'm telling you what is going on in my head. That doesn't mean that I'm not going to be here for you, through whatever. This is on me too. You didn't create it alone." I looked down, unable to meet his eyes. "I'm sorry. I just don't want you to feel like you have to do this. I know you aren't ready for this. We're still both so young...I just don't know what we're going to do. I thought kids would way in the future, not right on top of us." He let go of my face, and pulled me closer to him. "We'll figure it out together. I'm not going anywhere and neither are you. I love you." I sniffled, and swallowed down the lump that was forming there. "I love you too Colby." He kissed the top of my head. "Always baby girl." I smiled a little, my heart still racing against the news that was just dropped on us. "Always." I didn't know what this meant for us, or how it was going to affect us. I had never even been around babies all that much. I know that they cry, poop, and sleep. They are super cute though. I imagined holding a small baby in my arms, one that was looking up at me with ocean blue eyes, and my heart swelled. I placed my hand on my stomach, wondering if I could feel the life growing there. I didn't feel any different.  The nurse walked in then, and smiled at us, her expression concerned and motherly. "Here are your discharge papers, dear." Colby reached for them and she passed them to him. "There are some follow up forms in there for whichever OB-GYN you choose, so don't lose them. I wish you both the best." She smiled again and walked out. Colby and I stood up, hand in hand, and walked back out to the car. I felt like I was in a daze as I sat down in passenger seat. This was just too much to deal with day. My body and mind were still trying to shut down from the utter exhaustion that I felt, even though I managed to catch a couple of hours in the exam room. Colby placed his hand on my thigh, and I closed my hand around his. We didn't speak the entire ride home, but it was a comfortable silence. As we pulled up in his parent's driveway, I started feeling nervous. I knew they were asleep already because it was late so I didn't have to face them...yet. "Are we going to tell your parents while we're here?" I asked softly. He sat still for a moment after cutting the engine, staring out into the darkness, then shook his head. "No, I don't think so. Let's see what the other doctor says before we say anything to anyone." He looked back at me and a small smile curved his lips. "Let's try to wrap our own heads around it before we involve other people's opinions too." I breathed out a sigh of relief. I REALLY wasn't ready to tell other people. "Okay, that sounds good." We crept upstairs to his room, being as quiet as possible so as not to wake anyone. I changed, pulling his hoodie off of me and putting on the his t-shirt that he threw in the floor. I just wanted to wear something of his. He smiled at me when I pulled it over my head, but didn't say anything. He pulled on a pair of sweatpants, leaving his chest bare and crawled into the bed, holding the blankets back for me. I lay with my back against his chest, and his arm went around me, pulling me closer. "I'm sorry that your first time to Kansas has been so horrible. It wasn't supposed to be this way." I turned so that I was on my back, and his arm was lying across my stomach. "It wasn't all bad. The only bad thing was Tessa and Johnny." He closed his eyes for a moment, his fingers tightening against my stomach. "But that was really bad y/n." His voice came out strained. I nodded in agreement. "It was...but everything turned out okay and meeting your parents has been amazing. I even kind of like your brother." He crossed his eyes at me and stuck out his tongue, making me giggle. "Seriously Colby. I know the bad stuff has happened but I love knowing where you came from and the experiences you had when you were younger. Good and bad." His fingers dipped under my shirt so that his palm was flat against the skin of my belly. "You're next, ya know. We still have to go see your Mom in a couple of months. That should be fun. Does she have loads of baby pictures that I'll get to see?" He teased me, and dragged his fingers to the side, tickling up to my ribs. I jerked away, my body bowing sideways to avoid the torture. "Stooop! You know I can't stand that!" I replied laughing. He chuckled and pulled me back against him, his hand going to its original place on my stomach. "So does she?" I groaned thinking about it. "Probably already sitting out on the coffee table waiting for us to arrive." "I really can't wait." He said leaning his head over to kiss the shell of my ear, before he kissed my cheek and snuggled his head against my neck. We lay there quietly, lost in our own thoughts, with neither of us mentioning what was really on our minds. Eventually, I heard his breathing slow and get deeper, his arm growing heavier on my stomach. I moved slowly, turning into him, his head dropping back on his pillow. I leaned up and reached my hand out to push the random bits of curly hair from his forehead. He muttered a little in his sleep, his hand tightening on my hip, where it was now resting. I smiled and leaned down, pressing my lips to his.