Fallingforyou // Matty Healy

Sidelines

I lay in my old bed, the walls lined with old drawings I had done as a teenager and photos of the boys and I. Sleep was hard, the glow in the dark stars that littered my ceiling occupying my attention.

A thumping sound echoed through the room, I ignored it imagining it was the cat knocking a cabinet. Not seconds later, another thump.

I walk towards the window, looking down the street until I notice Matty. Rolling my eyes I open the window and lean out.

"Have you heard of a phone?" I whisper yell.

He lets out a giggle, "That's no fun. I didn't have a phone when we were 9 and this did you just fine."

"Are you coming up?" I question.

"Up for a walk? I can't sleep."

Holding a finger up to indicate I'd be down in a minute, I throw on my shoes and creep quietly down the stairs. I silently laughed at myself, acting like a young Bea who used to sneak out and now here I was almost 27 doing the same.

Matty nods his head in the direction of the woods, I fall into step with him. He speaks up first "You look comfy, did I wake you? M'sorry."

I look down at my pyjama bottoms and jumper and shrug "Couldn't sleep, s'fine."

We walked in silence until we got to the river, sitting down on the makeshift stools we had made as kids. Matty pulls something from his pocket, waving it at me giddily.

He rolled it and we handed it back and forth, letting the high take over us.

"I broke up with Amber." He says abruptly. I shift to face him, my face scrunched.

"I'm sorry M, do you want to talk about it?" I ask softly, not wanting to hurt him.

He shrugs, waving the joint around so that embers fell. "She seemed nice to start off with but she sort of just turned. She tried to make me pick between you and her tonight. I picked you obviously, I wasn't going to not have you in my life because Amber was jealous."

Silence.

"You broke up with her because of me?" I ask stressed.

Matty must sense the stress in my voice because he grabs my hands in his. "No, well kind of. Bea, I swear don't stress about this. I wanted to break up with her for a while but then tonight was just the cherry on top."

"You're my best friend. I already fucked up once, I'm not going to allow it again. Amber wasn't good for me." He says desperate.

"Matty, it scares me how much the both of us are willing to do or give up for one another." I tell him truthfully.

He smiles "George always did say we were soulmates."

I let a sad smile escape at this.

"Over the last year I've learnt that it's ok to be independent. Your career and happiness should come first, always." Matty goes to say something but I continue. "I don't mind being third place, I'm always going to be on the sidelines cheering you on." I let my fingertips trace his jaw.

He lets out a sigh, his eyes closing and hand coming up to keep mine in place on his cheek. "Beatrice Hart, you have no right making me feel this way."

"Don't full name me Matthew, you're going to be ok. I promise." I tell him sincerely.

"As long as I have you, I will."

a/n: this is a continuation from the last chapter :)