My Only One

CH 39.

Sorry for not updating Last Sunday. I had a bad headache that day so I couldn't even write a sentence 🌹

Hope you Enjoy this Chapter ❤

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Author's Pov : 

Sehun stared at his room ceiling, which was not so appealing to the eye but yes it does have one similarity. It was blank, empty, plain white just like his mind. Not that he cares, he just was grateful for having any thoughts right now cause he even wants a break from his so-called thoughts. 

Sighing, he got up in a sitting position before standing up and walking towards his wardrobe pulling an inner white shirt and a cream-colored hoodie over it. Plugging his earphones and mobile with him he calmly walked out of his room and towards the main exit. 

He needs a walk, to cheer his mood and also to avoid thinking. The afternoon was not as cold as the night but still, it was not that warm as well. Putting both his palms inside his Hoodie pockets he listened to the soft music playing through the earphone. He walked slowly as the sidewalk was wet with snow and watching out in front so that he wouldn't collide with any passerbys. 

Walking in such weather would definitely cause him to fall sick but then he was so bored staying in his house that he had no choice but to get himself out from those huge walls which suffocated him the more he stayed under them.  

Sehun has also not failed to notice the slight change in his Grandma's behavior. She has gotten more distant but not completely. Yes, they would have their breakfast and dinner together every day but she has grown to stay in her room a lot not even leaving it when Sehun is home. For Sehun she has always pampered him, looked after his every need and every problem, and even to keep him company but nowadays all Sehun gets is a good morning cheek peck and good night cheek peck. That's also one of the reasons why he couldn't afford to stay in the house any longer. 

It's also not like Sehun can't contact Kyungsoo or Baekhyun but the more days have passed the more he has started to notice how both his best friends have to dwell with their own problems. Watching them facing their own difficulties, Sehun feels like he wants to become like them too. So why not? 

He can rely on himself for his own problems too. It's not that he is doubting himself or anyone who has been by his side, he is thankful really but for how long would they or anyone would shield him, for how long would they help him tackle his demons? Now that Life is getting ahead he needs to rely on himself more than anyone else. He was done blaming and hurting himself. Yes his sufferings and pain won't just wash away in a second, yes his nightmares and his worries won't disappear in just one night, also yes that his scars and all the dark thoughts won't fade just like that but he would try. Try to take a step forward, he would try to fight even if he would burn in the process he would try to help himself. That's the only first step he needs to take now for himself. 

Sehun didn't notice how far he had walked alone but as his eyes fell on the park and the hollow chattering of the wind he let himself just enjoy the silence. He walked towards the frozen pond and sat over the bench just below a huge tree which was nothing but hollow as well with snow covering its head. 

Trust your instincts

They have never changed

From that face from the start

Experienced how much change

Too much to predict

Quietly going by