Betrayed, pitiful, sad, crushed?

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Later in the early evening that day, I was sitting in the common room trying to work on the project for Transfiguration class but I ran into difficulties since Draco had the parts that I needed to complete the work.

I set aside the project and decide to work on Herbology homework. I started to chip away at the schoolwork until I realized I needed a book from the library about the plant I had been learning about.

I stroll down the hallway towards the library and I hear a familiar voice getting closer.

I turn the corner and come to a sudden halt as I see Draco snicker but it came to my attention that he wasn't alone.

He was accompanied by a girl and they seemed to be enjoying themselves. As I got a clearer view I soon realized who the girl was.

Non other than Pansy.

Pansy Parkinson.

I don't stay around long enough for them to be able to see me but I did stay long enough to see Draco pull Pansy close to him.

"Please, you must be joking" he says to her while laughing.

Words couldn't clarify the emotions I was feeling at this moment.

Betrayed, pitiful, sad, crushed?

I hurried to the library attempting to figure out how to ignore the surge of emotions that filled my body.

I sat in the back of the library and sucked my tears back to myself.

I turned out to be in the right aisle I needed to be in to find my book for herbology.

I scanned the racks for my books and once I spotted it I grab out of the shelf and sat back down at the desk.

I started to ponder internally to why Draco moved onto Pansy in the range of five hours.

I knew they were friends, however when we were sitting on the roof that night, he told me he never felt anything more to her than a friend. He admitted to me that she was to self-absorbed and consistently had her attention on everyone else's problems.

Those were the reasons he appreciated the fellowship so significantly yet additionally loathed her in some manor.

I decided that I should probably head back to the Slytherin house to complete my work which I had left there because I thought it would just be a basic outing to the library as it typically was but today was anything but basic.

My parents had came to the school which caused me to loose good friend. Someone I thought could be more than a friend.

I strolled down the isles and analyzed the books and people. I started thinking did Draco even mind that I was unable to speak to him anymore because for me it seemed like a wellspring of ratification vanished.

I was so caught up in my drawing thoughts, I didn't even realize I bumped into someone.

I snapped back to the real world and notice it was the blonde hair boy who I had just spotted in the hallway with Pansy not to long ago.

The individual I didn't even want to cross.

Draco and I remained in silence for a brief moment.

I wanted to ask how he was?

What was he doing with Pansy?

If he ever felt anything more than just a friendship with me?

But I don't. Maybe it was best if I don't know.

I gradually walked past him and return back to grazing down the aisles.

I turn my head slightly and see him gazing back at me, watching me as I leave.

I had a great amount to say to him yet I didn't have a clue on how to tell him.

I make my way in the common room and I gather my belongings and stroll up to my room. I don't want to deal with my school work at this time.

I get into my dorm, shut the door, and break loose out of frustration.

This would be the first time I have ever cried over a boy.

I have constantly set up a divider, an obstruction among myself and others. I wanted to be viewed as a compelling aloof young lady.

To my parents, not showing your emotions was an indication of solidarity not weakness.

With Draco, I gradually put down those barriers and permitted him in and now I felt frail.

I don't regret talking to Draco, he always had fascinating stories and things to say and I discovered he was similarly as weakly confused as me. It was more so that I didn't enjoy this feeling, this displeasing emotion that made my chest tighten up and feel sore.

Being friends with Draco Malfoy wasn't harming me, being friends with Draco Malfoy was diverting me from the tragic things I was forced to do. The person I would inevitably be compelled to turn into.
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And so the one of many heart breaks begins...

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