Stay With Me - Yeongyu FF

Chapter 32

Beomgyu POV

I try my best to keep my thoughts away from the fact that I'm about to dive and get water over my head and probably get a huge amount of mentally painful flashbacks as I nod to Yeonjun.

That's it. I have enough of waiting. I'll dive.

I take a deep breath and go. I head straight down to the bottom of the lake and, before I even realise it, I feel my fingers brush the sand. It was soft, with very small grains, and was different from the one you walked on when entering the water, where the sand was only remnants of coral and seashells.

I then feel my lungs start to ask for air, so I kick myself back to the surface. When my head gets out of the water, I shiver at the cool of my wet hair and look around for Yeonjun. I finally see him coming back up a few metres away.

"I dove a little farther so we wouldn't block our paths," he says, "by the way, the lake is really pretty from under the water. I can ask Dad to bring us goggles if you want"

I smile at the idea. I wanna see what it looks like from under the water, especially since it already looks good at the surface.

So Yeonjun gets out of the water, drying his hands with his towel, and grabs his phone, calling for his dad.

"Can you bring us my goggles please? We wanna see under the lake" he says joyfully.

I hear his father's voice on the phone. "It's already 4pm, don't you want to do some other things?"

I look at Junie who seems worried. "I think it's just that 'Ma is a little scared for me"

"But, do you want to go out?" He asks

Honestly, I do want to go out. I find swimming tiring, especially when I haven't been swimming for nine years.

That's what I tell him, and although he looks a little sad, he quickly cheers up, and tells me that he has a board game he wants to play with me anyway.

So that's what we do, Yeonjun tells his father we changed our minds and I get out of the water with Yeonjun. It was rather cold outside since I got used to the water, so I run to the closest towel, turning myself into some sort of wet burrito. Yeonjun laughs and grabs his towel, making a burrito beside me. We keep rolling apart and into one another like a burrito fight, laughing and laughing until even Yeonjun gasps for air.

We then begin going back towards the house. When we get there, we briefly part ways, one in Yeonjun's bedroom and the other in the bathroom to put some "actual dress wear" like 'Ma said when we arrived. Once we're ready, Yeonjun gets out the special board game he wants me to play with him.

It was an atypical board game, one that required strategy and seemed difficult. The game, inspired by a certain Sherlock Holmes book, consists in having one player be a criminal in disguise and the other, Holmes and his team. The goal for the police player is to trap the criminal, while the criminal player's is to escape.

The game wasn't the easiest to understand, but I managed to get it after one try-out game. We ended up playing that game six times, switching roles everytime, with games lasting around 30 mins each time.

By the time we're done, 'Ma comes into the room.

"It's already 7pm. I'm probably going to head home soon. You wanna stay here Beomgyu?" she asks.
I look at Yeonjun before answering: "I'd love to if it's okay with Yeonjun's parents"
"It probably is" says Yeonjun.
'Ma chuckles before continuing: "I'm sure it is too. But I'd like it if you came home tonight instead of sleeping here. Could you tell me when you're leaving?"
"Yeah sure" I answer, knowing she wanted me home tonight to make sure I'm still okay tomorrow after all the swimming, "But I think it should be around, like, 8 or 9pm depending on whether or not I can stay for dinner-"
"Of course you can babyyyyy" says Yeonjun, hugging me.
I hear 'Ma sigh: "You two remind me a lot of my relationship with Beomgyu's dad"

I turn to Yeonjun. He looked really guilty at what 'Ma said, so I stare softly at her, trying to tell her to explain that it's fine. But she doesn't get the hint, so I tell him instead.

Once 'Ma leaves the room, Yeonjun and I go back downstairs, to make sure it's okay for me to stay before she leaves completely. His parents accept that I stay for dinner, so I tell 'Ma I'll be home by nine for sure. For some reason, when I told her I'd be back at nine, Yeonjun seemed jealous.

Why? I don't know.

So when we go back to Yeonjun's room I decide to ask him.

"It's nothing, don't worry" he says, but I don't believe him. So, I start thinking about that time when he came to my house, and his father called him because he wasn't home and it was six, while now I literally just told 'Ma I'd be home at 9.

Is he jealous because I can go home whenever I want as long as I tell 'Ma but he has a curfew??

I ask him if that's his problem. He waits a little before nodding softly. I smile, and hug him. It's funny that such a small difference of rules and liberties can get him this jealous.

"I'm sure that if you tell your parents in advance that you'll be staying late, they'd be fine with it" I say, trying to comfort him. He nods again.

I quickly change the conversation, and we end up chatting about everything and anything. Before we notice it, it's already time for dinner. While we eat, Yeonjun's Dad tries to have a conversation with me again, during which I stay as calm as possible, trying not to explode and make him feel uneasy like I did at lunch.

Soon, I realise it's 8.30pm. I sadly ask if Yeonjun could bring me home, and while we drive, I can't help but stay silent. I guess it's because I'm tired. Weirdly enough, I felt fine up until after dinner, but now it's starting to kick in.

I think I fell asleep during the ride, because I suddenly feel a hand caressing my hair.

"BabyGyu... You're home"

I open up one eye to see Yeonjun patting my head softly, smiling. For some reason, I'm certain he's just filled up his camera roll with pictures of me sleeping, probably because his phone is just laying sideways, mostly out of his pocket, but that might just be me.

I lazily get up and out of the car, and wait for him to come out too so I can give him one last kiss before going home. Once I finally accept to let him go, I start making my way up to the front door, sending him flying kisses. I then realise that it's already 9pm, so I tell him goodbye one more time, and get inside my house.

'Ma was washing her dishes from her dinner. I suddenly feel really guilty for leaving her alone, and decide to clean the dishes with her. There's already not much left, so I also apologise. Even though she says it's fine, I still feel like I was rude. It's only now that I realise how lonely she must feel, especially since, for a few years now, she's cut ties with her old friends to take care of me.

Why do I keep making myself feel even more guilty?

I can't stop apologising to my mother. I tell her about how I'm sorry for leaving her alone, for spending less time with her, for being the reason she lost most of her friends, etc.

She tells me again and again that it's fine, but I find it so hard to believe. That night, I still felt slightly guilty, but I finally manage to tell myself it is okay, that now that I'm getting better, she's going to be able to find her friends again, and I imagine her meeting up with her old friends. I think about the times, before my illness, when I'd come home after school to an empty house, with a little note that said "I'm at the cafe, come join me" or "At person's house" - of course, it wasn't written person on the note, I never managed to remember their names - or again, "I'm at the cinema/mall", and I was happy that she'd kept contact with a bunch of friends after 'Pa's death.

I then end up falling asleep, and dreaming about some alternate time, in which 'Ma would go see all of her friends one by one, and tell them she can finally hang out with them again, and for some reason, I'm sure that I smiled in my sleep.

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So much for the "fast update" 🤦‍♀️

I was actually writing ahead and forgot I hadn't posted this one hehehe......

..............

Sorry haha