Chapter 50.)

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"Why keep him alive, bruv?" Kwan finally asked King as they sat at the lake while King tried to get his mind right. It's been three hours and the first two, they spent it in complete silence.

"He has a kid," was King's short answer.

"Plenty of men we killed had family," Kwan reminded.

"I had no attachments to dem..." King trailed off and Kwan caught on to what he was saying.

"Do yuh tink di gyal will run her mouth?"

"Nah," King mumbled, staring at his swollen knuckles.

Kwan stared at his brother for a moment then gazed ahead as the sun began to set. "It's fine to cry."

King sucked his teeth and Kwan chuckled.

"Did you know?" King finally asked and Kwan frowned.

"Know?"

"Never mind," King sighed, closing his eyes, his mind was all over the place.

"If I had known di bwoy touched Renae, mi wudda been killed him before yuh even heard."

"Yeah," King slowly nodded. "Right."

"I suspected play if dah what yuh meant. Did I waah fi choke di bwoy out when I caught him standing too close? Correct, but Renae never asked for help or gave signs of being uncomfortable," Kwan explained. He knew he didn't have to but King was his brother so he felt obligated.

"Did he... fuck her?"

King shook his head.

"Wah wuz it? If it's ok for mi to ask,"

"Don't wanna talk about it," King replied dismissively and Kwan nodded.

"I am sorry... not just for dah but for not being there for yuh."

King remained quiet.

"We cum fram different playing fields but did di same ting fi get by... don't beat yurself up about going after his family, he needed fi learn. I'm just... I wuz shocked yuh didn't kill him," he admitted but King remained quiet.

"Yuh can put Yung bak fi bed," Kwan nudged him softly.

Laying back, King held his right arm up and stared at the bracelet that had each charm symbolizing the kids and Renae.

"Yuh aren't a bad person... never have been," Kwan told him.

"I cheated on her..."

"And did yuh learn yur lesson?" Kwan queried.

King stared at him confused.

"Yuh sought out intimacy in another woman kaaz yur wife hurt yur feelings, yeah?"

King just blinked.

"Let mi tell yuh som'p," Kwan sat up and stared at King seriously. "A man who iz nuh sorry doesn't cry or beat himself up for a choice he made. A man who understood dah he wuz rong doesn't constantly remind himself of di fuck up he made. A man who does not care about wah he's done would throw it in his partner's face every chance he got. I have yet fi see yuh do dah other than always apologizing and trying fi right his rong. It'z yuh stop beating yurself up."

"You don't get it," King sighed then shook his head.

"Mi?" Kwan frowned offended. "Mi madda killed herself kaaz mi bastard of a fadda cheated, I get it and know yuh are nutten lakka dah bitch!"

King stared at him for a while, "My bad."

"Yeah, yeah," Kwan waved him off and checked the time. "Yuh ready?"

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