Make Me (Remdy)

We All Have Issues

An AU in which Andy's band is looking for a new guitarist and backing singer.

Trigger warnings: Mentions of death, strong language

Remington is one of the last into the room for the audition. When he opens the door and steps in front of the four men, they all look rather bored, though it's the frontman, Andy something or other, who looks to be the most fed up. In fact, he has his head on the table when Remington first sees him.

The man beside Andy nudges him and Andy groans and lifts his head. "Name?" He asks bluntly, looking at a piece of paper on the table before him.

"Remington Leith."

"Your real name."

Remington sends him a rude glare. "That is my real name. Sorry it's not boring like yours."

Andy picks up the pen and crosses something out. "And how long have you been playing, Remington Leith?"

"Twelve years."

"And how old are you? Because you look like a child."

"Twenty-seven."

"If you say so," mumbles Andy. He's kicked under the table by a frustrated band member. "Go on, then. Play something, will you?"

Remington picks up the guitar that they've set up for the auditions. He learnt a few of their songs prior but if he's honest, he knows fuck all about any of them other than the front man because he's all over the internet. He read some questionable things about the man. Things about him being rude to his bandmates, rude to bands he tours with, rude to fans, rude to everybody, basically. There are rumours that he's pissed off venues enough that they don't let him perform there, that he's insulted and criticized various bands that show him support. The only reason Remington is even here is because the band is popular and famous and it's more enticing to join them than to join a band with a few thousand fans.

So yes, he's shallow.

Though he is also a fantastic guitar player, and some would argue an even better singer.

Andy smiles forcefully once Remington has finished. "Best one all day," he says blandly, then, "congrats, Remington Leith, welcome to the band. Sort your clothes out, we don't wear skirts."

"Andy," the man beside him scolds.

Remington shakes his head. "Well, I do, so suck it up."

"Go now. You'll be emailed all the shit you need to know."

"How did you get any fans?" Remington asks rather boldly.

"By being hot. You should try it someday. Go now."

"You're not hot," Remington tells him, "because being rude automatically makes you ugly. Bye." He turns and walks away, throwing the door open and stalking out of the room with a smirk on his face because he knows he's just got himself into some trouble.

Remington googles Andy again in the evening. He finds out after a lot of searching that the man surprisingly is married to a woman called Juliet, who is also a singer and who also has been called rude, insulting, undeserving of her fame. Remington rolls his eyes at the screen and clicks follow on both their Instagram accounts, because if he can't beat them, he'll join them. He has nothing to lose. His brothers are dead (I'm so sorry to hurt you like this but it's another sad one), his parents have isolated him, his friends are cunts. What harm can a troublesome band possibly do now?

The next time Remington sees Andy and his band mates is in two days, after having received an email about rehearsals and so on. He arrives at the location provided through the email in his car, pulling up outside and getting out the vehicle to the scene of Andy and how he vaguely recognises as Juliet yelling at eachother. Remington isn't too sure what to do, so he awkwardly stands there trying not to eavesdrop, though that's virtually impossible to do when they're shouting as loud as they are.

"I fucking told you this already!" Andy is claiming angrily.

The woman laughs sarcastically. "Sorry I don't remember every little thing that comes out of your selfish mouth!"

"You don't listen to me, that's why you don't remember shit I say! So for the last time, I'm going away for two weeks to film a music video! You do what you fucking like, I don't give a shit! I don't care what you do anymore! Have an affair for all I care, it doesn't fucking matter to me at this point! I for one couldn't be more excited to sign the fucking divorce papers!"

Remington's eyes widen.

"What the fuck happened to you?" Juliet asks.

Andy shakes his head. "I realised life is a joke," he says, turning and walking away from his wife, slowing when he notices Remington leant against the car. He closes his eyes for a moment before going inside.

Remington, unsure, follows him through the door, carrying his guitar and leaning it against the wall in the large room. For the whole rehearsal, Andy can't look at Remington, and so the younger assumes that nobody knows about the problems with his marriage.

Nobody until now, at least.