Make Me (Remdy)

We All Want To Be Someone Else

Trigger warning: mentions of depression, suicide, self harm, death, murder, abuse

Andy does not set Leo's house on fire, and when he tells Remington of his change of plans, he says, "There's no reason to hide it."

Remington looks at him, startled at the words. "I killed a man," he says as though Andy doesn't know. "I want it gone."

Andy put his hands on his shoulders. It's the early evening and they've been trying, for the past few hours, not to think too much about the death. "You were defending yourself. You're innocent."

Pushing him away, Remington shakes his head. "I want it gone," he repeats in a panicked voice.

"No, hon. That will only make it more suspicious. I have a plan and for it to work, you have to cooperate."

"You said you'd burn his house. Do that."

"No, Remington. Don't you see how suspicious that would be? What if they put out the fire and found him still intact? It'd be clear a murder had been hidden if we did that. No, this is the best way."

"You're gonna let them find me and execute me?"

"No. Listen to me. I have a plan."

"What plan?"

"You plead innocent on reason of insanity."

Remington falls silent, his eyes two black holes in his pale face.

"You were feeling threatened and didn't know what to do and, because you aren't in your right mind, you came to the conclusion that killing him was the only way."

Remington shows no sign of acknowledgement.

"They are not going to take your side if you don't give a legitimate plea, so you're gonna tell them the truth. You're not stable, you haven't been stable for a long time, and you were in distress. You have records of multiple suicide attempts and self harm, you have Angelica to back you up with her professional opinion and diagnosis, you have every right to plead innocent, but you have to hammer home the idea that you have not and are not of sound mind. I will be your alibi. I'll tell them the truth, that you're dealing with the loss of family and you're struggling, and you'll be okay."

Remington steps back until he hits the wall and slides down it, sits on the floor with his head leant back.

"You have to tell them the truth."

He closes his eyes.

Andy sits beside him. "If you don't tell them the truth, they won't be kind to you. You have to tell them that you are and were in distress and acted out of fear."

"They'll commit be," Remington says finally.

"Yes," Andy agrees. "But that's a whole lot better than being executed for murder."

"Is it?"

"Yes."

"I'm not crazy."

"No, you're not. But your unstable and they need to know that."

"I don't want to be crazy."

"And you won't be."

Remington puts his hands over his face.

"It's gonna be okay, but you need to do this. You need to be honest."

"I killed a man," he whispers. "I killed a man, Andy. I don't want to be innocent."

Andy rests his arms on his knees, which are pulled up. "You did what anyone would have done in your situation. You were scared."

"I killed a man."

"Hon, stop. You were defending yourself and you are not in a stable mind to make rational decisions."

"You think I'm crazy."

"No. I think you acted impulsivly and I think you were under threat and you were saving yourself."

"They're all gonna think I'm crazy."

Andy takes his hand and holds it. "No, they're not."

"I don't want to be me anymore."

"You're gonna be okay."

"I killed a man. How is that ever gonna be okay?" He pulls his hand away and gets up.

Andy sighs. "We have to do this right," he tries.

"Do it right? I killed a man, nothing about this is right."

"Remington, you need to calm yourself."

"What fucking right do you have to tell me to calm myself? I killed someone, Andy, and now you're telling me it's because I'm fucking insane!"

Getting off the floor, Andy tries to take his hand, but he pulls away.

"Everything bad always happens to me. I watch my two brothers die, I get called a slut and a whore and whatever the hell else because of how I look, I am unable to make any rational decisions because all I can think about is dying, and I fall in love with you."

"What the fuck is falling in love with me got to do with it?"

"Well every time you're around, something goes fucking wrong!"

"I didn't get in a toxic relationship with an abusive builder and then kill him, did I? I'm trying to help you, Jesus Christ. I rescued you from him so many times, how the hell is any of this my fault?"

"I only met him because you dumped me!"

Andy laughs. "Fine," he says dismissively. "Do that. Blame me for everything like you usually do. See where that gets you." He shakes his head. "But if you gave this a moment of thought that isn't clouded by your depression, you'd see how much I'm just trying to help you."

"Oh, that's nice. Have a go at me for something I can't control."

"Go and burn his house down why don't you?"

"Maybe I will."

"See you on the news. Headline, Black Veil Brides' guitarist murders ex boyfriend and will face lethal injection."

"Can't wait," Remington spits. "Anything to get away from you."