A Court of Love and Healing {ACOTAR}

Goodness and Grievances

Emerie's eyes widen and she slowly lowers the blade onto the counter, her cheeks turning red in embarrassment.

"Balthazar? D-Did you say Balthazar?"

He inclines his head and a smile to kill for spreads across his face, dimples and all. "Yes. It's nice to formally meet you, Miss Emerie Bardsley."

"You...you're the Balthazar. The one from the Rite that Nesta told me about."

"I am", he bows in a flourish and keeps grinning boyishly, before straightening out and moving closer, holding his hand out for her to shake. "I hope you don't still plan to stab me. I swear I have no ill intention."

She clears her throat and leans forward, clasping his hand in hers. A shudder wracks down her spine and she lets go quickly, staring up at his tall form. "It's nice to meet you too...um, I should thank you for helping us. Helping me. Those evil males really bested me, and I thought I was as good as dead as I passed out. I still don't understand why they didn't finish me off...maybe they thought drowning would take care of me, I don't know. But Nesta got me out and then you sheltered us, and I can't even tell you how much that means. So thank you."

Balthazar blushes slightly and glances at his hand with a confused expression for a split second, before looking back at her face and grinning again. "There is no need to thank me. Even as a warrior, I was told that if deaths can be prevented, then to prevent them. Worthless killing is what evildoers enjoy, and we are supposed to be on the side fighting for good. Therefore as warriors, we should not be stooping to the level of our ruthless opponents unless they pose a threat or it's absolutely necessary to do so. One of the things my father taught me", he says softly. "I never do enjoy killing, but I will protect good people with brute force if I must. I'm no coward."

"I don't believe you are. In fact, I know for a fact that it takes more strength to spare a life than it does to take it. It takes more will to stop violence than to inflict it when emotions run high. I admire that about you. Nesta gave me a rundown of your conversations the night that we stayed in the cave and...I just want to you know that I appreciate it. We both did. You are part of the reason we survived the night I believe. We would not have been the winners if a beast had eaten us", she chuckles lightly.

"Please, Emerie", he begins.

Emerie feels her insides coil at the suave way her name rolls off his tongue.

"Don't ever credit me for giving you a boost to the finish line. I didn't. I had no hand in how strong and brave you and your friends are. You all survived, and you survived because you are warriors who are even greater than the males who participated; myself included. That was not me who helped you win, it was yourself and your friendship. Do not credit me where credit is not due. You did it on your own. All three of you. I know Nesta didn't make it to the very top, but she is still a Carynthian in my mind. I heard about what happened...some of the men were complaining. Er...pissed off that she didn't die. I try my hardest to have as little contact with those bastards as possible. I cannot fathom how some males think of females still, even now. And sometimes evil breeds evil. I see them as no better than our enemies and as much as I dislike death, I would have no qualms about watching them all fall. In fact, I would enjoy it. Illyria needs change, and I hope someday soon, someone will actually step up and make it happen. That the laws will be better enforced so illegal clipping and violence against females will be nearly extinct there. But it may not be as long as I live, and that saddens me."

Emerie can feel herself tearing up again and she resists the urge to hug him tightly and see what his scent is like.

Wait, what his scent is like??

"I know I keep saying this, but thank you. For...your philosophy. For how you feel. My father was the exact opposite, and many times it made me afraid of all males. After he died, I realized that nobody was going to take my joy away from me anymore and I slowly got over that fear, especially when I became the owner of the shop and nobody, not even my horrible family could take that away from me. But to meet a male such as yourself that I am not quite familiar with is a breath of fresh air. Really and truly."