A Court of Love and Healing {ACOTAR}

The Powerful and The Powerless

Emerie squeals happily as Balthazar lands on her balcony with a thud, placing her back on her feet, his wings ruffling and stretching behind him as he does.

"That was so much fun. And the food there was amazing, thanks for taking me."

"Anything for you, starshine."

She blushes softly and goes into her top-floor loft, trying to stretch her wings, but a small, painful grunt escapes her lips. The muscles have been freezing up lately, causing her a lot of neck and back pain. It's been holding her back at training and everyone has noticed but were too polite to say anything.

"Em?" He looks at her concernedly.

"I'm fine", she whispers, passing her vanity and glancing into the mirror. All those horrid words come back to her along with the faux feeling of her father kicking her—wanting her dead like her mother. The image of him grabbing a heavy mirror encased in gold, only to bring it down onto her head and her back, fogs up her brain and she can nearly see her own mirror fracture, the shards exploding towards her face. She yells out and throws her arms over her face to protect it, waiting for the sharp cuts...but none come. Only soft, coxing words from her mate.

"Emerie...Em, it's not real. It's not real. You're okay. I'm here." Then he's behind her, his arms carefully yet protectively wrapped around her body like a weighted blanket, warming her, soothing her. "It's alright", he murmurs, pressing a kiss to the back of her neck. "He's gone, he can't hurt you. I'd never let anyone hurt you."

Like a dam that has been breached, all of her stress overcomes her and she can feel herself spiraling, her legs giving out as he holds her up, sobs ripping from her lungs. She's done everything right—everything. Her life is amazing, close to perfect even, and yet one fucking trigger...one sole horrid memory and everything crashes down around her within seconds.

Balthazar scoops her up and lies her on her bed, lying next to her and pulling her into his chest, letting her cry as he fondly strokes tear-dampened hair from her face.

"Why do you even want me?", she chokes out. "I'm shattered."

He shakes his head. "Shattered things can be pieced back together. I will take every broken shard of you and make a beautiful mosaic in the shape of my heart. Because that's you, Emmie. My incredibly strong and lovely mate, my very heart. And the only one that I'll ever love, from now until my final breath."

She sobs harder and wraps her arms around his neck, pressing closer into his warmth. "He'll never let me be happy."

Balthazar cups her cheek and tips her face up to look at him. "You don't need permission, Em."

"He haunts me, I can't get rid of him."

He leans in and nuzzles her nose, his thumb tracing her lower lip. "You can fight him. You're a fighter, a Valkyrie. Take your power back. Isn't that what it's all about? He can never, ever hurt you again. He's dead, Em. Dead. You just need to figure out how to bury him in your mind."

"It's not that easy."

"I know, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to sound like it is." He strokes a tear from her cheek tenderly. "You're so strong, Emerie. I love you."

She looks up at him, brown eyes gleaming. "I love you, too", she whispers. "Sometimes that scares me."

Balthazar pulls her closer and presses a kiss to her forehead, before leaning his on it. "You have no reason to fear loving me. I promise I won't ever let you down. I am yours, and you are mine. Forever, my love."

She sniffles and takes his hand, intertwining their fingers. "It seems so surreal sometimes. That I have a mate, that it's you, the male who the Mother put in my path in the most unexpected way. And how amazing you are...after everything in my life I needed this, needed you." She strokes his chest and looks up at his boyishly handsome face. "There were days I didn't think I would survive...and then Nesta and Gwyn happened. They made everything worth it again, they made life worth it. I love my shop, and it was mine to protect, but Bellius..."