chris sturniolo imagines!!

footnote

"but why would i lie it's so clear im in love with you" -conan gray, footnote

in which you confess to chris

tw// mentions of drinking (not involving the triplets)
___

you didn't like parties. they were too sweaty, too sticky, too loud, and way too anxiety-producing. they also reminded you of your past, and you hated that.

see, you struggled with drinking a couple years back. some family issues caused your common sense to be blinded by the dark times and you turned down the wrong path, ending you in therapy. the triplets, your life long best friends, were there for you through every step of the way. it was hard, but eventually you pulled through. chris' compassion, though, had you realize that you developed feelings. strong feelings.

with said feelings, you would do anything for him to like you. which is why when he begged for you to come to a party with him and his brothers, you zipped up one of madi's spare dresses and strapped up some heels without a second thought. you wish another thought would've come to your head, though, when the smell of alchohol came rushing back to you. you've been doing so good with recovery, but you were a major people pleaser. so when an old friend offered you a drink, you couldn't find it in yourself to say no.

one turned to three, and three turned to five. you were drunk, no doubt about it. you stumbled around the house lit by rainbow lights, trying to find chris.

"chris! there you are, hottie!" you slur, a goofy grin taking over your face as you fall into him.

"there you are," he starts. "let's get you home, y/n." he slings your arm over his shoulders and wraps his arm around your waist.

you lay your head on his shoulder. "you're so sweet, chris! this is why i like you so much. look at this gentleman!" you gush, taking notice of chris smiling lightly and shaking his head.

"yeah, you're pretty cool too." he holds open the door for you, but you stand still and shake your head.

"no, like, i like like you." you say, giggling at the repetitive word.

he gives you a look that you couldn't read even if you weren't shit-faced. he helps you into the car and buckles you up. "sober up, y/n." he shuts the door.

confusion clouds your brain as you begin to think. "why would i lie?" your thoughts come out loud, but chris chooses to ignore your comment.

the next morning, you decide you need to talk to chris. you fight though your pounding headache and make your way over to his room and knock gently on the door. you hear a soft, "come in," from the other side and you open the door and slip inside the room.

"hey, we should probably talk."

one very tense conversation later, you found out he "likes someone else."

"this girl, elise. she's in my college course, i met her at the beginning of the semester. she's funny, and kind, and pretty, and way smarter than me-"

"if i waited, could that maybe help?" you cut him off, hoping for any sort of chance.

"i'm sorry y/n, but patience won't change how i feel for you."

you nod in sadness and understanding, mumbling a quiet "okay," and slipping back out the door.

you were what every teenage girl claims to be - a hopeless romantic. hell, your favorite movie was the notebook for gods sake. you hated it, though. raising your standards based on men in movies and books. it was crazy what these men would do for their special little ladies. noah wrote to allie for 365 days. cameron learned french for bianca. jack died for rose. and deep down, you knew good and well no real-life man would ever do that. but there was a little part of you that kept asking this question -

could chris do that?

yes. that's what drew you towards him, his charming personality and thoughtful behavior.

but now you know, that isn't going to happen. so you decide to stop loathing your friendship and take what you can get. it's not like the movies or books, this isn't pride and prejudice.

-
your birthday was today. now, getting rejected by the seemingly love of your life wasn't the ideal way to celebrate, but you put it behind you and tried to still have fun. every year since you and chris were seven and finally allowed to go out on your own (even if it's just down the street), you two would go out. just you two and do something fun, whether it was get ice cream down the street at 10 years old, or going out to dinner together as big 19 year olds, you would look forward to it every year. you were turning 21 today, and chris was very excited to celebrate this.

"big 21! come on, let's go somewhere nice." he says, smiling wide.

you sigh and smile lazily from your spot on the couch. "chris, we're still doing this?"

"yes! it's a tradition! now put on your best gown, we're going to olive garden!" he smiles and rubs his hands together, proud of his little act.

"i'm not wearing a gown. but ill be ready in 15." you say, getting up and heading home (being neighbors had its perks).  you throw on a casual dress, similar to what you wore last year. after getting completely ready, you're about to go outside when you hear a knock on the door. you open it to chris standing there in a suit with a tie that matches your dress perfectly.

"m'lady" he says, holding out his arm for you interlock yours with his.

"how did you know what color id wear?" you ask, locking your door and holding onto his arm. you only keep the conversation going to distract you from the nauseating butterflies going absolutely batshit crazy in your stomach.

"i've known you my whole life, intuition i guess." he says, letting go of your arm and opening the car door for you. drivers side obviously, considering he still can't drive.

when you arrive at olive garden, you see a small table in the corner subtly decorated with your favorite colors. "chris, is this for me?"

"what? what are you talking about?" he acts clueless, but the smile in his voice is unmissable. he leads you over to the table and sits down with you, a waiter quickly coming up to the table after you sit.

"here's some moscato for the cute couple, big 21 i hear." he smiles, setting the bottle down on the table.

you two laugh as he hands you the menu and walks away. you learned your lesson, and neither of you drink it. you two laugh some more, but not because it was particularly funny, but because it was true to you.

dinner went smoothly, chris covering the bill and you two laughing like childhood best friends the whole time. it was times like this that made you the most upset. you could tell - you would be perfect together. but you knew you'd never be the one.

after dinner, you dropped chris off at home and stepped foot into yours, changing out of your dress and sitting on your desk, opening your journal.

feelings were reckless, you knew that. that's why your therapist recommended a journal to keep your feelings. as your mechanical pencil began moving, you just couldn't get it to stop.

you knew you loved chris, that's what most the pages in your journal were about. a love like this wasn't little, it was suffocating. and it killed you a little more each day that passed that he didn't feel the same.

you'd write lines on lines and pages upon pages of words for chris.

but from him, a footnote will do.
___
a/n- hey.. hey guys

chrissy's back

um
ghosting you guys since october then dropping this on you is kinda crazy on my part

idk what happened i just got a burst of inspiration and just started writing

idk if i'm back full time but i have some ideas 😁

love you all!! i missed you!! i hope you enjoyed crying over this!!

xx
chrissy