In which it's cold...
WARNING: This is a mature chapter, don't read if easily triggered!
"Hey, what happened, what'd he say in there?" Jughead asks as I walk out of the jail room, I avoid looking at any of my friends as I continue walking away from them, almost reaching the door, Jughead jogging to keep up with me.
"Nothing that matters anymore. Have fun getting him out of prison, Jones." I say, my voice void of emotion as I reach the door, Jughead stopping once I've walked out. Nobody follows as I head back home, the numbness I'd felt moments before flickering, short pangs of emotion pricking my heart like needles.
When I reach my house, my body freezing from the wintery weather, I find it empty, I don't waste any time going straight to my room and locking the door, feeling about done with life...
After about four hours of laying on my side in my bed, I drifted off into a sleep plagued with horrifying nightmares of that night only a couple of months ago, the night my life should've ended...
Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. Newton's third law, every choice has its consequences. Even Isaac Newton knew there would be consequences to my actions, but I didn't seem to. Getting drunk at a party full of people I didn't know, getting raped. Dating a Jones, having my heart shattered. Having unprotected sex, getting pregnant... everything has consequences, I wasn't immune to them.
I thought of all this as I stood on the ice, my feet clad only in fluffy socks, my legs and arms bare, the long t-shirt and shorts that I'd fallen asleep in the only things that blocked out the cold wind. I looked down at the ice below my feet, wondering just how long I'd survive down there before death finally came forth to cradle me in his arms.
I looked around myself briefly, seeing nothing but white snow around me, the banks of Sweetwater River looked almost as inviting to the part of me that wanted to live as the freezing depths below me were to the part that knew I had to die. I kneeled, punching the ice around me with two fists, the pain lasting only for a couple of punches before my hands went numb from the cold, and my blood coats the ice before long.
"Gwen!" I hear someone call to my left, damn, I knew I should've waited until I got to the riverbanks to send the damn messages, instead of sending them before I left the house. I begin to punch more rapidly, the ice finally crackling, I almost smile, I stand and look over to the people gathered at the banks to the left of me. Jughead, Archie, B, V, Reg, Cheryl, and Angela all stand there, unable to stand on the ice, in fear that it'll take them down as well.
I'm surprised by the look on Jughead's face like his heart is about to be ripped out of him slowly and agonizingly. Every action has its consequences, the consequence of this particular action is hurting the people I care about, but their pain won't last forever. They'll move on, they'll forget me. I smile at them before I hear a deep crack, a brief weightlessness overcoming me for a moment before my feet hit the freezing water, the current dragging me down and pulling me under the ice.
Drowning is different from what I thought it would be, especially when you're the one who wants to drown. My brain was racing through every possible means of escape from under the ice, my body mindlessly flailing, trying to fight the water, I'd been the one to toss myself into the depths, but apparently, that wasn't what I'd truly wanted for myself. If it was, I'd find it much easier to give into the burning in my lungs, the slowing of my heart, the draining of my energy. I wouldn't be fighting.
My movements become sluggish, darkness taking over my brain...
The last thing I see before everything goes black is a hand reaching through the water, and a circle of light becoming brighter...
Then everything goes dark, a silent peace overcoming me...
Is this what death feels like?
Aaaaaaand...it's done. Yep, I'm leaving you on this, I know you hate me, you don't have to say it. Love you too! Hope you didn't cry too hard. <3
YOU ARE READING
More Than I Should... (Fp x OC)
Fanfiction"Juggie, I'm your fucking girlfriend! Betty's my fucking sister! How could you do something like this?" I asked him throwing every ounce of betrayal I felt into the words I said. Jughead looks to the ground, obviously guilty but not enough to spare...
