Nothing Like Us (L.H.)

Chapter 44.

THIS BOOK IS ALMOST ENDING. Omfg.

I AM SO LATE TOO OMG IM REALLY SORRY. I was so caught up with my personal life bc.. i dunno. It became interesting for a while. Lol.

Anyway, here it is. ENJOY. (Or not)

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Stress. Stress. Fucking stress.

Paperworks. Deadlines. Complicated feelings. Messed up thoughts. The list is freaking endless. I wish it would end now. But they just keep on coming.

Andy and Melissa are busy too. We barely even have time to see each other.

Right now, I'm on the verge of finishing a palette of colors for autumn. Somehow, it's calming, but thinking of the deadline and everything else while working at it just erases the "calm" away. God. I feel like crying.

Once I finish this, I still have to do another report on a lesson and connect it with what I learned in Sydney. Fuck this shit. But the deadline is still a week from now, so I can breathe a little. I feel like crying. All of this could just be so suffocating at times.

To add up to the deadly bunch, Luke had been messing up with my thoughts lately. As much as I don't him to, he just.. I don't know. He's just there. And I don't know how I could keep him away. I tried to not answer his calls, not reply to his texts, but somehow, I still end up doing so.

Since last week, we didn't see each other. Andy kept on bugging me about what he saw. He kept on reminding me about Nick, because God knows I forget about him at times. I feel so terrible. Oh God.

Anyway, not seeing Luke means more messages and more calls from him. He keeps on worrying when I don't reply or answer his calls. Everytime, I wanna' tell him that he doesn't even have to worry about me. But I like how he does. IT'S COMPLICATED.

I told you I'm messed up.

Halfway through my work, my back aches, and so does my head. I'm hungry and I'm tired. And I'm too damn lazy to make dinner.

I grabbed my phone and texted Melissa and Andy.

Me: Dinner??

All Time Low was playing in the background.

Andy: Cant. Not done with my pallete.

Me: Me neither.

Andy: lol i havent even started!!!

Me: psh. Goodluck.

Melissa: Aw sorry, syd. I cant. I have plans with michael tonight. I was just done with my palette.

Me: awww okay. It's fine. :)

Hopelessly, I scrolled through my contacts. I need someone to talk to. I don't even feel like having dinner. I've been eating donuts since I started on this project about an hour and a half ago.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Stress. Just full on stress. I need an escape. Even just for a while. I need to breathe. I can't be alone right now. I might end up being extremely sad, and when I am, God knows what I'll do to myself.

I sighed, pushing back my tears before deciding to send another text.

Me: Hey. You busy?

It didn't even take him a minute to reply.

Luke: I'm free now. Why?

Me: really? No band meetings?

Luke: uhh we were supposed to go clubbing tonight except for michael.