Prelude To the Stars [Jackson Wang AMBW]

Chapter 31: Vulnerable

Jackson's POV:

"Eden, you have to wake up now." I whispered in her ear.

She stirred, but then swatted me away mumbling. "No, Jackson. Just let me sleep." As realization dawned on her she sat right up and just looked at me. I smiled at my beautiful wife, but then she just started crying. I reached out my hand to her, and she quickly moved away.

"Bǎobèi, gàosù wǒ shénme shì cuò de. Wǒ zài zhèlǐ wéi nǐ. (Baby, tell me what's wrong. I'm here for you.)" I said inching closer to her. She noticed, of course and held up her hands.

"Please, just stop! I beg of you not to touch me." Eden cried.

"Why don't you want me to touch you?" I feigned confusion. Eden continued to sob. "Bâobéi, if you don't tell me then I can't help you."

"Don't you get it? You couldn't help me even if you wanted to. You're not real. This is all just some messed up dream that's soon to turn into another one of my nightmares. You'll fill me with hope, but then I'll wake up in the real world disappointed, alone and pregnant." She sighed. "It's better this way. I don't think I'd be able to take it if you walked right through me. I'm not ready to face the fact that you're dead."

God, how I've missed her. Against her protest I hugged her and held on tight. "You can try and push me away, but I'm staying. Our love cannot be easily broken." I rubbed her small protruding belly. "You're the best thing that's ever happened to me. So don't think I'm letting you go."

"Ān dí yòu huíláile. (Andy has returned.)" I stiffened at her comment.

"H-how is that even possible?" I stuttered looking out into the field.

"After you all.... left... Jesus and His calvary came. Together we defeated Baldassare and his army. I asked Jesus to resurrect everyone again. I had passed out and a month later I woke up in someone's bed..."

"You slept in Andy's bed?" Anger rose up within me.

"No, if you would've let me finish my sentence than you would've known that I woke up in bed alone." She rolled her eyes.

"Oh..." I sheepishly rubbed the back of my neck. "I'm sorry."

She glared at me before continuing. "I walked down the stairs and came across Andy. 5 minutes later his mate comes in as well. Long story short she and I got into a fight..." she said looking away in guilt.

My eyes widened. "Eden, you're pregnant! Why aren't you taking better care of yourself?" I scolded her. She kept her head down and cried silently.

"When I seen them together, happy and in love, it makes me miss you so much more. Besides she threatened me first." News of her missing me made my heart swell. Eden quickly looked my way but then avoided my eyes. "So... I was thinking... if Andy came back that means you'll come back too, right?"

Somehow I knew this would come up. I shook my head. "Look, Eden..." I sighed. "It's better if you forgive me and just let me go."

Her eyes snapped to mine. She looked like she would explode at any minute. I watched as she quickly rose to her feet. My hand instinctively reached out for her wrist, but she released herself out of my hold. The pain she was experiencing shook me to the core. I've convinced myself that this was for the best. We would never work out this way. "This is for the best. You know that, right?"

"The best?" Eden scoffed. "What would I know about it, huh? You've always put me last. It was always about fulfilling Jackson's needs, and screw everybody else who got hurt in the process. Well I got hurt the worst! I had to taste your betrayal every time you were with her. Each time you gave her more of you, you were slowing killing me."

"Bǎobèi, I didn't know..." I rose to my feet stepping closer to Eden. "Let me help you." I begged her. Her pain was suffocating.

"You want to help me so bad?" I nodded my head. "Then release me. If you won't come back then break our bond."

I stared at her wide eyed. She couldn't be serious, could she? But as I searched her emotions I knew she was telling the truth. "I can't do that, Bǎobèi."

Her hand flew across my face. "EVEN IN DEATH YOU'RE STILL CAUSING ME PAIN! Understand this, I will find a way to break this bond between us. Make no mistake about it. I won't let your betrayal be the death of me and my son."

"Son?" I smiled at her. "We're having a boy?"

She turned her back to me. "Death will be our fate if you don't man up and face your demons." Wow! She sure knew how to rain on my parade. "Do you know what it feels like to have everyone hate you? I have to bear your shame and mistakes for all to see. It was never supposed to be this way... We've spiraled out of control."

"Eden...."

Her next words broke down my defenses. "I hate you, Jackson!"

"You don't mean that." My voice cracked. She found my vulnerability, my insecurities and she was forcing them to the surface.

"I hate that I've been blindsided by your betrayal. I hate that even after I showed you my vulnerability you still hurt me. I hate that I still need you. I hate that I still want you. I hate that this bond is killing my child. I hate that in spite of all that you've put me through... I still love you."

"Our child. He is our child." I corrected her.

"You lost the right to call him your child the moment you chose her over us again." There was a dull aching pain in my heart. That could only mean that Eden was bearing the majority of it herself by trying to keep me out. I had seen her clutch her heart. "I died for you twice. What more will you take from me until you're satisfied?"

They weren't kidding when they said the truth hurts. "I died for you too, Eden." I tried to justify myself; I tried to hold on to the little bit of wall around my heart that I had left, but I knew she was right. I was being a spoiled brat, and it was time for me to take responsibility for my actions.

"No, you died for yourself, because you were too much of a coward to face the consequences of your actions. We're done here." Eden said through tears. If only she knew how she was my weakness.

I grabbed her wrist like my life depended on it. I couldn't lose my family. "Wǒ ài nǐ. Nǐ zhīdào ma? (I love you. You know that right?)" But I was met with silence as she vanished before my eyes.

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♡Song: Backstreet Boys- I Need You Tonight