Standing Under Clouds/Jennifer Jareau/Criminal Minds fanfiction.

Chapter 22: The Pills

A sad soul can kill quicker, far quicker than a germ...
-John Steinbeck

I do the only thing I think will ever make it better. I need to sleep. I need to rest, I cant keep going like this. I decide to take some sleeping pills. I take a hand full of pills. I am being reckless, but I just need to sleep. I lay down on my bed and close my eyes.

"Finally." I whisper to myself in a heavy breath.

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I wake up at 4pm. The amount of pills I took kept me asleep for a very long time. I get up still feeling drousy. I decide to make breakfast. I start to cut up a apple when.

"Shoot." I say to myself. I accidentally cut myself with the knife. I rub the spot where I cut and put it under water. Its a long slick cut across my hand. I disinfect it then wrap a medical bandage around it to prevent infection.

"Buuuuuz Buuuz." My phone beeps and I check it, its a text from Emily. I ignore and then keep cutting my apple.

"Buz buz buz buz." Now she is calling me. I press the ignore button and walk back into my bedroom. I walk past the mirror and then all of the sudden feel anger grow inside me. I look at the reflection of myself. I take my fist and pound against the mirror with force while screaming causing it to shadder. The minute after I do it I regret it. Although I regret what I've done I just ignore it. I go around and cover every mirror in my house with black plastic covering.

"Screw mirrors." I say to myself.

"Buz buz buz." Its Emily calling again. I decide to answer it.

"What?" I say in a rude tone. I did not mean for it to sound rude but I am on a rampage.

"Sorry am I interrupting something?" She says sounding worried.

"No, sorry I did not mean to- What do you need?" I say in a more friendly tone.

"Well you said that you wanted to have a girls night with Garcia and I so I was wondering who's house we were doing it at." She says.

"Oh yah uh which ever." I say.

"Okay you wanna do it at mine?" She asks. I feel relieved because my house isn't guest ready.

"Okay cool! Say sevenish?" I reply.

"Yep sounds good." She says.

"K see you then!" I say hanging up. I pick out a outfit since its already 5pm. I decide on a pair of nice black jeans with a purple button down half sleeve blouse, and brown leather boots. I put my hair up in a messy bun. I'm going for a casual but nice look. I look at my watch, 6:30. I should probably get going. I grab my purse which holds, my wallet, wipes, mascara, ect. Basically everything you find in a women's purse. I am about to leave when I stop myself. I run onto the bathroom and open the cabinet. I almost forgot the pills the doctor prescribed me, without these I would be a nervous, anxious wreck. I would pretty much be scared of my own shadow and of any people without these.

Once I arrive in front of Emily's apartments its 6:58. I make my way up to the door. I knock on it and then here footsteps.

"Hey Jayje." Emily says happily while opening the door.

"Hey." I say while stepping in. As soon as I step in a smell of warm food that makes my mouth water washes over me.

"I already have dinner started and Garcia just texted me that she's on her way.

"What are you cooking? It smells wonderful." I exlaim.

"Italian noodles, Rossi's recipe." She nods once as she says it.

"Oh it better be good then." I say jokingly. As soon as I do the doorbell rings. I smile and walk to the door with Emily following behind me.

"Hey Garcia!" I say exitedly while she gives me hug.

"Hey Jayje, Hey Emily!" She replys.

"Hey." Emily responds. I see Garcia's look on her face as she tries to figure out the smell.

"Whats that smell?" She asks. "Is Rossi here?" She says laughing. We all laugh too.

"No Emily is cooking one of his recipes for italian noodles." I say smiling and pointing at Emily.

"Wait he gave you the recipe? I can never get him to budge when I ask him, how did you get him to tell you?" She asks seriously but jokingly.

"I have my ways." She says smiling. We all laugh for a moment.

"So guys do you wanna watch a movie?" I asks as Emily goes to continue cooking the noodles.

"Which movie?" Garcia asks.

"I don't know lets go pick one out." I say smiling. Me and Garcia walk over to Emily's movie shelf. We shuffle through them for a bit talking about the ones that we watched as kids and the ones that scared us half to death. We decide on one called '10th clover field lane.'

"Dinners ready!" Emily called from the kitchen.

"That smells wonderful!" Garcia exclaimed excitedly.

"Haha thanks Garcia!" Emily replies back.

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After dinner we decide to start the movie. Emily puts it in the DVD player and we all take a seat on the couch.

"You guys go ahead and start it without me, I'm just gonna go to the bathroom." I say while standing up and heading to the bathroom. I feel it coming on and I need the pills.

A/N: Hey guys! I dont really know where Im going with this story but I'm still enjoying writing it. Ps the reason there is a quote is because I was listening to music so I felt the need for a quote! Lol. Thanku: blackbirdjeid jeid_4life