Aberration ≫ Jarchie

F I F T Y

Seventeen Years Old ❣︎ March
(Continued)

Archie remembers everything.

Every word laced in honesty and pain, and every expression of hopelessness and anger is etched into the redhead's brain.

He wishes he could've forgotten it, he wishes he doesn't have to remember seeing the beautiful wreckage finally crash and fall apart. He wishes he never had to hear the earth shattering sound of his sobbing, he wishes none of this had to happen.

He wishes Jughead was always treated as beautifully as he is, but he isn't.

Archie could have changed that, but he didn't.

And now Jughead doesn't believe he's beautiful at all.

How can someone so amazing believe they aren't? How can someone so smart and observant not see that? It's not fair, and Archie's heart drops just thinking about it.

How could he have not known he was going through all of this for so long? How could he have not known that the beautiful wreckage was drowning himself for years with all of this?

Jughead is way too good at keeping things in.

I guess Archie just never knew he was hurting him this much. Sure, he's not the only one who's hurt him but he was the the final push Jughead needed to send himself to the bottom of the ocean.

Then there's the fact that he's asexual? Archie isn't really sure what that means and he's never heard of the term used before unless it was to describe single celled organisms.

That doesn't mean he should have went off on him the way he had. He went way overboard, and he can admit that was uncalled for. Jughead was right when he said that he was always there and understanding for the redhead, but he wasn't in that situation. Maybe it was the alcohol, but in all honesty Archie isn't sure what to say about it now because he still isn't really sure that's a real thing.

How can you just not be attracted to someone?

But he's going to try and understand as best as he can, and he'll research it just to earn his trust back and to try and accept it because he seriously loves the beautiful little mess.

But the part that confuses Archie the most, is that Jughead is in love with him.

He would have never in a million years saw that confession coming. He should be happy, ecstatic even, but he isn't.

He doesn't deserve him.

All the redhead has done is hurt Jughead lately, one way or another, and he isn't even sure if he deserves to be liked by him, let alone loved by him.

Archie wants nothing more to confess his feelings back, but now he's not so sure if that's the best thing. Jughead just started to become happy again without the redhead, and what if coming back into his life doesn't make things better for him?

Archie finally opens his eyes after sitting around in his mind for a couple minutes and squinting at the sunlight coming in from the bedroom window. He involuntary smiles at the sight of Jughead cuddled into his side and continues to glance over his face and his body with absolute adoration.