Girl (completed)

45

In the coming weeks, I began to "sleep around." I found it to be perfectly okay, but I knew that John was worried about me. It was just better than feeling nothing all of the time. One night stands just gave me a sort of rush.
To lie in the arms of a stranger, there was something truly poetic in it. I felt like I was finally living, and it forced John to care for the babies most of the time.
"Leaving so soon?" Called my last night fuck, and I brushed my hands through my tangled hair in the mirror.
"Sorry, what is it?" I asked, searching for his name.
"Charlie."
"Ah yes," I said, emerging from the bathroom to bid him farewell, "well I must be off," I said, "but it has been lovely."
•••
When I got home, Paul was sitting on the couch with John, and both boys turned to face me when I walked through the door.
"Woah, rough night, Blaire?" Paul asked, and I rolled my eyes, "still as sexy as ever, I must say," he commented, and winked at me. I blushed and John cut his eyes at him.
"Where were you?" John asked, and I shrugged, covering my mouth to yawn.
"I'm not sure," I said, which was true. I don't know how or where I fell into the arms of the stranger.
"You don't know?" John questioned, and I shrugged.
"It's all a blur. I want to say a club, but I could be wrong. I woke up with a stranger and came home," I said, and John shook his head.
"I don't even know who you are anymore," he said, and I shrugged.
"Get used to it, or get the hell away from me," I spat bitterly, and turned to go to my bed to rest.
•••
"Blaire, wake up."
"Blaire, come on!" John shook me, amd I rolled over, opening my eyes slowly.
"What?" I whined, and he sat on my bed.
"I just wanted to let you know that me and the boys are having a few friends over as a goodbye. They should be here in about an hour," he said, and I sat up, groaning. The last thing I wanted to do was see people.
"What time is it?" I asked tiredly, and John checked his watch.
"Eight," he said, and I hastily jumprd out of bed.
"P.M.?" I asked frantically, and he nodded.
"I've been sleeping all day!" I said, and he nodded. I quickly made my way to the bathroom and brushed my teeth.
After taking a shower and doing my hair and make-up, I headed downstairs and heard men talking that I didn't recognize.
"Don't you live with that Blaire girl?" One asked, and I heard John reply.
"Yes," he said, and one sniggered.
"I heard she's a big slut now," one said, and I froze. It was so weird to hear people talk about me like that.
"I heard if you ask nicely, she'll let you fuck her brains out," the other unfamiliar voice said, and I could tell that John was getting angry, but trying to remain calm.
"She's just in a rough place," he argued, and it was a bit hurtful that he didn't say that I wasn't a slut.
"Come on, don't make excuses. What do you really think?" One asked, and I felt my heart pound as I waited for his response. I don't know why, but John's words really mattered to me, and what he said next hurt me more than anything he'd ever done.
"I think she's just sleeping around because she's had it rough lately," he said, and I had to cover my mouth with my hand to stop myself from crying.
"So she is a slut?" The other asked, and John hesitated.
"I'm not going to answer that," John said, and I walked down the rest of the stairs, and the look on my face must have said it all because John already looked regretful before I even spoke.
"You think I'm a slut?" I asked, and the men looked down, except John. He opened his mouth to speak, and I went running up the stairs.
"Blaire, wait!" John called after me, and I ran into the bathroom, slamming the door and locking it. He knocked on it loudly as I searched through the medicine drawer.
"Blaire!" He called, and I found what I was looking for. I opened the pain medicine and took a handful, emptying the bottle and downing them with a handful of water from the sink. I rifled through the medicine cabinet some more, and he must've heard it because he began beating on the door mercilessly. I took some random pills, and began to feel whoozy.
"Blaire! Open the damn door, please!" He pleaded, and I finally unlocked it, letting him in before I fell.
"Blaire."
"Hey Blaire, open your eyes."
"Blaiiirrreeeeee."
I finally opened my eyes, and colors swirled in my vision. People continued to faintly call out my name, and my eyes were wide.
"Where am I?" I called out, and I put my hand in front of my face, but it swirled in front of my eyes.
"Blaire!" I came out of the hallucination for a moment, and I bright light blinded me. I was only concious for a few seconds, but I recognized John's voice calling out to me.
"Are you scared, Blaire?" The familar voice hissed, and I nodded to the snake.
"Let me go," I said, and the snake laughed harshly, the sound peircing my ears and causing my insides to turn. I felt like I was going to be sick.
"You shouldn't be scared, my love. I'm here to help you," it promised, and I shivered. We were in the garden, and shadows grew and fell upon the gray concretened ground.
"I'm so sorry," I apologized, and it laughed again.
"You needn't be sorry, my dear. You did nothing wrong. It was everyone else," the voice said, and I shook my head, hanging it low in defeat.
"It was me. I did this to myself," I sulked, and the serpent argued.
"But they drive you to do it," the snake reasoned, and then I got angry.
"Leave me alone! Get out of me head!" I said, and the snake struck, biting my ankle.
I woke up screaming, and hands quickly held me down, restraining me.i opened my eyes, and John and a bunch of nurses were the ones restraining me.
"Give her another dosage," one said, and I fell back asleep, but this time I saw nothing.