I DON'T BELIEVE IN LOVE NO MORE - Yung Lean Fic

★FIFTEEN

LUNA'S POV
* 4 days later*

I've been going out to town and going to bars by myself. I know its not safe but I can take care of myself plus I have a blade that Ben gave to me. Also not to mention that ive met a guy named Lucas, he had blonde hair, bright blue eyes and he is so sweet. We have been hangout and texting for the past few days. Its been taking my mind off of things and it feels good to have a friend that isn't in the same group of friends.

I text Lucas and asked if he wanted to hangout at a small café. I knew if i invited him over the boys would freak and it feels disrespectful to do that kind of thing.
I headed out and walked in the café down a few blocks.

"Hey!! Hows it going?" He gets up pulling a chair out for me and walking back to his seat. "Ive been okay, just been working on some stuff for my friends and trying to rest up. This flu sucks." I rambled on. "What do you do for your friends?"
Shit i didn't mention anything about the boys but im not sure if i want to say what they do. "Oh clothing line, i could show you some of their products." I pull my phone out showing him some of the sad boys gear.
"Sad boys?... Sounds familiar.. Wait you work with yung lean and the sad boys?!!!" His eyes widened..
"Ah... Busted.. Yep that's me, not many people know that i help them." I take a drink of my coffee. "That's really cool! You should introduce me to them one day!" He smirks.
I don't think that would be a good idea, especially with Jonatan, and how he's acting.

"Right now, i don't think that's a good idea.. Yeah um Jonatan.. I mean Lean doesn't like new people around the house." I pick at my muffin. He nods and goes on talking about when he was in school and funny memories.

We soon left to the park,but it was freezing cold, Lucas gives me his jacket and we kept walking around.
"Hey mind if we take a picture? I could tag your name on snapchat?" I say pulling my phone out, Lucas agrees and i unlocked my phone not remembering that i have a collage of Jonatan and i together. "Are you guys a thing? I didn't know yung lean had a girl?" He questioned. "Not really together we are just close... Well at least were.." I sigh. Moving on i snapped a picture of us with a filter and with the caption "Hangout day with @ Lvcas435 😈" and posted it.

We soon parted our ways and i headed home early. But speaking of the boys, Axel, Ben and Micke all texted me and blowing up my phone,I sighed reading them.

All said the same thing..

Shermy wormy ; Luna stay away from Lucas... Hes bad news..

Ben woodn horse ; Jonatan is flipping out about you hanging around Lucas.. Please stay away from him... x

Micke ; take down picture.. Jonatan is pissed! Lucas is bad!

What could Lucas have done to them.. I thought he didn't personally know them, or me?.. So many things are going through my head, i delete the picture and text them back. I went to the living room and smoked and watched some Breaking Bad.

JONATAN'S POV

"WHAT THE FUCK IS LUNA DOING WITH LUCAS???!!!!" I throw my phone at the wall.
"What? What do you mean Lucas?.. Like the punk bitch from that one time?" Ben looking up from his phone. I nod and he pulls up Luna's story. "WHAT THE FUCK MAN!NO WE NEED TO GET EMILIO AND TELL HER TO NOT GO OUT WITH HIM!" Micke spat getting his phone calling him.

Fuck i miss her so much but I know im no good for her. Her smile, laugh and her eyes are stuck in my head. I need her but she doesn't need me.
I start getting angry about this whole fucked up situation.

My mind has been fucked up lately and its getting worse. I feel like im losing control over myself. Im never sober but ive been mixing lean with morphine and weed. The guys tell me not to but there's nothing they can do.
I pop a few pills and down them with the dirty Sprite. "Thats going to fuck you up Jon..." Ben shakes his head writing down his verses. "Fuck off man." I mumbled under my breath. So far we only have 3 songs for my album and 9 more to go. "Fuck man shes all i think about Ben.. I.. I think i love her.. But I'm just so-.." I stumbled on my words. "So fucked because of your trust issues... You can't trust her because you think she's Frida?..." Ben gets up going in the booth.

"Yeah.. That..." I mumbled. My body was feeling the drugs kick in. I leave the studio going to my room and lay in the dark.

I let the demons take over and the darkness embrace my lonely body. I close my eyes and spoke to myself like death was listening to me.

"I don't even deserve to be here. Im not worthy of being alive. And if i die tonight or tomorrow, just know i wouldn't care." I mumbled to myself crying. Im back in this deep hole that i cant get out of. I don't mind dying at this point, its like shes haunting me. Thats all i think about and she will forever haunt my thoughts. "Maybe if i take a few more pills i will die in my sleep?"
I thought to myself.

To;
My moon 🌙;
I hate you.. I hate you because youre all i think about and im fucking scared.. Im in this deep hole that i cant get out of.. Im blaming you for all this.. I hate u...

I sent to Luna, my mind is fuzzy and no control over what i do. Its too late to unsend it and im fucked..

Maybe it wouldn't be that bad you know...my body felt heavy and i started to drift off to sleep. I don't even remember what is going on and i dont care.

|| if anyone is reading this, should i make a new cover or leave it.
Also disclaimer, none of this is real so dont think Jonatan or anyone in this book is really like this in real life||