★SIXTEEN ★

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Today i decided to stay in because im sadly still sick and im not the happiest. I remembered i had my medication so i took that knowing its not going to work but i gave it a try. I glanced at my phone on the charger, there was a text from Jonatan at 2am.

From:
Jonatan💘;

"I hate you.. I hate you because you're all i think about and im fucking scared.. Im in this deep hole that i cant get out of.. Im blaming you for all this.. I hate u..."

I was emotionless, but anger soon took over and i threw my phone on across the room. I grab a blunt and light it walking in the backyard sitting on a chair next to the small water fountain.
"Unbelievable... How did this shit get so bad?... Its practically making me insane. This cat and mouse shit.." I spoke to myself out loud.

I went to the kitchen and sat on a stool logging on my Mac but got up to make some lunch for me. My laptop started to ring and it was Jonatan trying to facetime me,but i laugh to myself declining it. I don't want to see his face right now, soon Ben tried to call but i knew it was Jonatan trying to call.
I went back to cooking then the laptop rings one more time and it was Axel , i decided to answer because im tired of them bothering me.

"What?..." I turn the stove on. "How are you? Feeling any better?" Axel spoke. "Still sick but its whatever. I know you called because Jon.." I say walking away getting the food and putting it on the pan cooking it. "Yeah.. Just please talk to him or dont.. Just let him see you?" Axel said softly and shrugged, i gave in and sighed.
"What do you want Jonatan... Haven't you said enough?" I spat at him turning around making my plate and setting it down next to the laptop.

"I just need to see you.. Im going crazy." Was all he got out.

"Whatever..." I start to eat, all he did was stare at me as i ate. I got annoyed but continued to eat..

Its been fifteen minutes and he has been watching me and would say a few words here and there. We soon hung up and i went on with my day, I felt bad but the text said enough.

Lucas tried to get in contact with me a few times but i blocked him. I didn't want to make things worse between Jonatan and I.

I gotta admit i do miss Jonatan and being in his embrace. It felt like home and right now i feel so alone, sadly to say without him at this point in my life im nothing and need him. Its been hard,i understand hes going through a lot with his ex, but so have i with Nate and such. He was so abusive and tried to force me to do things i didn't want to do.

I start crying at the memories of the times he would hurt me and say hurtful things. He took my first time away from me and i wasn't ready. Then he would leave me then try to come back. I probably would have killed myself of i didn't end that relationship.

But Jonatan isn't like this,at all actually. Hes so much more than that dick Nate. Jonatan is so sweet and would do anything to help people he loves, out. Ive seen how he is and not to mention the obvious, but Yung Lean is a different sperate person from Jonatan. They are totally two different people and most fans think hes this asshole and doesn't have a sweet side. But he does and we see it all the time. I know right now it doesn't seem like it but who can blame him.

I go get my phone but i realized after my hothead ass threw my phone it cracked all over but it still worked. I went on social media and i finally decided to go public but made personal account just to have a private side. And soon my social blade was rising. I don't see why people were so interested in my life but i mean i am apart of Jonatans and the boys life now.
I got the occasional comments like "groupie", " Slut", "Im sure shes sleeping with all of them!", type of stuff but ive been told to just ignore it.

I posted a picture of Jonatan and I, putting the caption. "Can't wait for you to get back! Miss you,ya goof💋💘" and i tag him. Everyone was going crazy. So i decide to go live on Instagram and talk to fans.

"Hey guys!" I smiled at my phone. And everyone was commenting and telling me how much they wish to be me.
I read a comment that said "Luna,your parents must be disappointed in their daughter! From what i seen on your profile you didn't start doing drugs till you met yung lean and now you are living with big time druggies?!"
I rolled my eyes, "Listen guys... Can we not bring up my person life and leave my family out of this type of shit. Or i might just delete my account and make a new private account."

I got annoyed after a while so i thanked the people who watched and i went off. Putting my phone down i go and take a bath. I put on some lil peep on in the bathroom and i laid back enjoying this alone time.

‡ sorry these chapters are boring but its just a filler. Also i hope you guys like this. If this fails i might un publish it and start a new book. Idk

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