DISARRAY (Niall Horan A.U)

Chapter 29

I am Louis hahaha

***
Niall P.O.V

"Niall, I-I I really like you." Jess takes a deep breath. "I want to know everything about you. I want to know about your childhood and the silly fights you and your brother would have. I want to know how you became the man you are today."

Jess genuinely likes me. I had my suspicions that she was starting to feel the same way I did by the way she looks at me. Part of me thought I was imagining things. Jess is finally letting herself like me. Tonight has been amazing with her. For once she isn't worried about people thinking that we are dating. I have taken advantage of this opportunity. I hold onto her hand or keep my hand on her lower back. Now she is telling me that she likes me and wants to get to know me. Jess is probably the most selfish person I know, but here she is caring about someone else. Someone who could potentially break her heart. I never would, but it's still scary. I want to tell Jess everything I feel and that I want to date her. What if it scares her? I need to ask Harry if he thinks it would be a good idea.

To stop myself from blurting everything out I grab Jess and kiss her. Hopefully she will know that I am trying to tell her through this kiss that I really like her too. I kiss her passionately and follow my instincts. Her lips seem to fit with mine perfectly. How is it possible to like someone this much so fast? I have only known Jess two months and all I want is to be with her. The need to be closer to her causes me to want to deepen the kiss. I stick my tongue out to be met by hers. Without any thinking I bring my hand down to Jess' chest. I don't really know what I'm doing. My body is in control now.

"Niall," Jess moans.

Hearing my name come from Jess that way only makes me want to be closer to her. As I grab her breast I realize what I am doing. I pull back and try to catch my breath. Letting my mind become clear again.

"We, uh, we s-s-should go back inside." I stutter, making me embarrassed. I grab her hand and lead her back to the house.

We spend the rest of the night with our friends. I am scared to touch her, because being this close to her is hard enough. I can't let myself touch her the way I did. I just want to tell her how much I care about her, but it's too much. It will freak her out.

***

"Harry, I need your help." I say while urgently walking into his room.

"What did Jess do?" Harry asks while looking up from his textbook.

"She did nothing wrong. This is all me." I take a deep breath. "At the party last night she told me that she likes me and wants to know everything about me. Her telling me that makes me want to-"

"It makes you want to be you." Harry says cutting me off.

"I just want to tell her how beautiful she is and she is so," I try to think of the right words. "So imperfectly perfect."

"Yeah, um." Harry brings his hand up and pulls on his lip. "You cannot say anything like that to Jess. She will run, nay, sprint to a bar and drink until you are distant memory."

"What do I do? I have the strongest urge to tell her how I feel." I look up at the ceiling and pull at my hair.

Harry jumps out of his seat and walks over to me. He places his hands on my shoulders and says, "you need to fight that little voice in your head that is telling you that Jess wants to hear what you have to say. Fight the urge, Niall. Keep your distance until you know that you won't blurt anything out." Harry lightly chuckles.

"I can't stay away from her for that long."

"We are going to her parent's house next weekend. Just focus on getting your homework done so you won't have to do any next weekend." Harry smiles at me and then looks at his desk. "You also have football to focus on."