Chapter 2: First Life - I'm Sorry I'm Dumb

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"Yi Huai! Yi Huai!" I called out to Yi Huai, the friend who came to live with us in the village. My Grandma said that he was going to be my husband one day. I didn't know what husband meant, but as long as it meant that I could still play with him then I'd love to be husbands with him forever.

"Stop shouting so loud, I'm right here." He looked mad. Again. I knew the looks of mad, sad, and happy on people, even though I was slow. Yi Huai always looked mad to me but because he was so pretty I just never cared and smiled at him.

"Oh... sorry. What are you doing?" I watched over his shoulders as he wrote something on a piece of paper.

"You won't understand." I understood a lot of things! I understood that to avoid a bath by Grandma, I just have to eat my dinner slowly until she fell asleep. He just wouldn't give me a chance.

We were twelve at the time, but Yi Huai was much smarter than I was and much more mature. While I still liked to play house and make food out of mud, he was reading collections of... of something. He said they were classics.

"Yi Huai, when can we play?" I said waving around a stick. He sat calmly at his wooden desk while I was on the ground with the stick in hand.

"Have you finished copying the scriptures I showed you?" He asked. I didn't think he expected me to have done it.

"I haven't..." I confessed.

"Then we can't play."

"Fine. Fine. I'll do it."

I reached over to borrow one of his brush and a piece of paper. I didn't know how to write all the lines. They were confusing and in my head the lines moved around and didn't stay in place.

"Yi Huai... I forgot how to write this one..."

"Tsk. How many times do I have to show you?" He was getting even more annoyed with me. Why was I always making him mad?

He took the brush from my hand and slowly wrote out each word for me. My eyes followed the movement of his brush, forgetting each steps that was taught.

He sighed and said, "How are we going to get married if you can't even do something as simple as this? I'm afraid you'll drop our kids on their heads."

Kids? Us? Married?

"Does that mean you agree to be husbands together?!" I smiled at him with big eyes.

He clucked his tongue at me, making me wipe the smile off my face quick.

"We're not going to be husbands together. Not anything, if you don't improve."

"Okay..."

Yi Huai and I were taking a stroll on the path outside the village to go watch the sunset. I was happily skipping along while he slowly took his time behind. He was taking forever to catch up, so I decided to pick some flowers and wait for him. I passed two aunties on the way and said hello to them. They smiled at me, but they had weird expressions on their face.

"Look at the poor thing. Doesn't even know why she is the way she is."

"Don't you think she's better off?"

"Why would you say that?"

"Her parents died in that fire, but she lived not knowing. She almost died from inhaling all that smoke, but was saved by Magistrate Wu."

"The very people who caused her family to break apart."

They both shook their heads, staring at me. I quietly plucked wild flowers, giving them side glances. Were they talking about me?

"The two children were betrothed at birth, and it's likely Magistrate Wu won't honor that bond. I just hope that Old Lady Guo understands this."

Just then I saw Yi Huai's dark expression behind the two aunties. They turned around and saw Yi Huai's angry face. They almost jumped out of their shoes when they saw him! Quickly scattering like burned ashes, the two aunties ran back to the village.

I ran to Yi Huai and show him the bunch of wild flowers I picked for him.

"Yi Huai, do you like them?"

"Mm. I like."

Woah, it was my first time seeing happy on Yi Huai's face.

He pet my head like I was some sort of puppy. I was happy to see Yi Huai happy, so I let him pet my head.

Days spent with Yi Huai made me so happy. While the other children in the village were dirt poor, they still had the time to make fun of me, calling me stupid. I didn't know why it didn't bother me when Yi Huai called me stupid. It felt like he didn't mean it but also because even if I was stupid he still wanted to be my friend.

I was playing in Yi Huai's study when I heard that my Grandma came to visit Madame Wu, Yi Huai's mother. I wanted to see her too, so we can go home and eat dinner together. When I approached the main hall, I saw the look of anger on Grandma.

"They're both sixteen already. Why has there been no news of a wedding?" My Grandma asked Madame Wu this. Had I really grown in these past four years? Yi Huai had gotten much taller and his face slimmed down. He still had the same soft eyes as before.

"You know Yi Huai's getting ready to serve the Emperor as a court official. He's been busy establishing his career in the Imperial Academy."

"That doesn't mean that he cannot keep his promise to care for Mu Dan."

"I'll say Old Lady Guo... that girl has no living relatives left in this world. You need not be so righteous in upholding old promises that will do no one any good."

"As long as I am still living in this world, I will take care of Master and Madame's daughter until the day I die!"

"If she was sound of mind, I would have no problem with Yi Huai taking her in as a concubine but you see... she would just be embarrassing herself marrying my son."

"Don't forget that in the past your family leeched off of Master and Madame to get to where you are today. Doing Mu Dan this one honor will not swipe the past wrong you have done, but will give you a slim chance at redemption."

Madame Wu laughed at my Grandma. I saw my Grandma's clenched fists. She was shaking from anger. Does Madame Wu not want Yi Huai to be my husband?

The past few months, Yi Huai had been distant. I would see him here and there, but most of the time he would travel to the Imperial Palace to do 'work.' I wondered how lonely I would be if our marriage was going to be like this. Way too lonely.

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