Every Lifetime I Fall {COMPLETED but undergoing revisions}

Chapter 52: Third Life - Third Farewell

A trail of bloodstained snow followed us from Crimson Snow Valley Sect. Lu Kai carried my impoverished body, treating me like a delicate piece of painting that had been doused in water. The hoarseness of breathing brushed against his neck. I used my left hand to cover the stab wound on my torso, but the blood spilled out nevertheless.

Winter winds and the soft crushing of snow underneath his feet were the only sounds as we walked through the crystallized forest of Crimson Tear Trees.

With all of my strength, I whispered, "Lu Kai."

"Don't try to speak."

"But if I don't tell you... that I love you. Will you know?"

Stopping, he stared out into the distance.

"What?"

"Since I'm dying, I want to tell you how I really feel. I like you... Not as an older sister loving a younger sibling, but as the man I want to marry."

"Why..." gulping down he said, "Why did you tell me to marry Xiao Feng?"

"Because I'm stupid, all right? I tried to push you away. You can't marry anyone else but me." I struggled to keep the flow of blood from escaping my mouth.

Laughing quietly, his tears continued to drop.

I brushed away the streams on his face. My blood stained hand didn't leave streaks of red on his face, but the cold weather caused his cheeks to become inflamed. His silenced sobbing grew heavy with clouds of white visible from his exhaling despair.

White flecks of snow landed on his dark hair, the tears on his eyelashes turned to ice.

Kneeling onto the thin layer of snow, he held me close in his embrace. I couldn't even explain the feeling of being in his arms. It was like this warmth that the world could never take away from me, a promise of loyalty and protection.

"How am I supposed to live on without you? You are everything to me... my light," he revealed, holding back the sorrow in his voice.

"Funny." I smiled at him.

"What is?"

"You are my light as well." No longer fearing rejection and shame, I wanted him to know that I cherished him. I was no longer afraid since death was waiting to claim my soul, but I feared Lu Kai would cry endless tears until we reunited. How much pain he would have to endure.

"Na Li... Please don't leave me."

Showing him a reassuring smile, I said, "I'm right here. I'll always be right here."

Brushing the hair away from my face, he softly said, "I-- I love you."

"I know." I remembered that night when he got up the courage to tell me the truth of his heart much to the opposition of Wu Jing.

Inching closer, he lightly planted his lips onto my forehead.

"You must... You must live on. I won't forgive you if I die for nothing, Xiao Kai."

Bringing my left hand to his chest, I continued my last words, "As long as you have the Star Gem, I will find my way back to you."

"Then I will wait for you to come back to me."

Squeezing me even closer to his chest, I felt his lips on mine as I let out my last breath. Closing my eyes, I felt relaxed and released the hold on my body to the numbness of the cold.

Everything was nothing. All the pain I felt during the last moments was gone. Free from the prison of a mortal body, I had no form, but floated in the sky looking down on Lu Kai sobbing breathlessly over the deceased form of me. Rocking back and forth, his cries became distant. I could no longer hear. My connection to the world of the living was diminishing.

Watching him cry, an agonizing resurgence of tightness suffocated my heart. I wanted to scream out, plead for another chance at life. This time I would courageously allow myself to love.