IT characters x reader

Heartbreak Part 3

They said time healed wounds.

They said it wouldn't hurt anymore.

They lied.

Because it hurt even more than it did before. You hurt in a way you never imagined you could.

Every day that passed since that day at the Quarry, when you said goodbye to Bev, one by one, the Loser's Club fell apart. Richie and Eddie broke off from the group, but they were still best friends. You saw them walking around from time to time down the streets of Derry. Stan had joined the academic decathlon and debate teams, and had made friends with the smarter and nerdy crowd. Ben and Mike had also drifted apart, you assumed they bonded over being the later comers in the group, and now talked daily. Or so you assumed. You didn't actually know.

Unfortunately, that's not the worst part.

After Beverly left, Bill slowly began to shut you out. Once school started things got exceptionally worse. He stopped talking to you altogether. If you thought seeing him and Beverly together was painful, you weren't ready for the feeling that overwhelmed you when you lost not only Beverly, which was already hard on you, you lost every other friend you had as well. It was the worst you'd ever felt, and you were certain it was the worst you'd ever feel.

The days went by, days quickly turning to weeks, and weeks turning to months. Not a single word from Bill. Not even a sound. Not even a stutter.

You were alone, to put it shortly. Everyone you'd known and loved, everyone who meant something to you, left. You had no one, and you wanted nothing more than to leave Derry. Leave behind the pain and haunting memories of your past. So you took it to your parents. The idea wasn't exactly out of the blue; the three of you had been debating it for awhile. "Mom, Dad.." You started nervously, gaining their attention. "I think it's time we leave Derry."

Timeskip- 2 weeks later

Bill walked sadly down the street, towards the place he'd been unintentionally avoiding. Your house. He'd only recently realized, after 5 months, how much he missed you, and how much he'd neglected you in the past few months. He couldn't believe himself; how had he managed to not only let go of Beverly, but you too? He should've gone to you, confided in you, but he was stupid, selfish. He wanted to shut everyone out. Bill now, crystal clearly, saw how stupid he was.

He knocked on your door twice. "I'll get it!" You called to your parents, who'd been packing the living room furniture up. You'd decided to move as soon as possible. You opened the door, but your expression turned to one of confusion as you saw Bill standing there, scratching his neck awkwardly. "H-H-Hey, Y-Y/N.." He said, smiling slightly. You didn't smile back.

"Can I help you?" You asked, rather rudely. You missed Bill dearly, but you were hurt. How could he just shut you out for all that time? Did you really mean that much to him? Bill was obviously taken aback by your tone. "I j-j-just w-want t-to say s-so-sor-sorry, y-you k-know, for ig-ignoring you." "You're sorry?" You asked, ludicrously. Surely he was joking.

He looked completely confused. "Y-yeah?" "Wow. You think you can just come right back in here, smiling and apologizing, and everything would be fine?" You asked, and Bill audibly gulped, nervously. He opened his mouth to reply, probably stutter out a "yeah", but chose to keep quiet and opted for closing his mouth instead. "Unbelievable." You huffed, crossing your arms and shaking your head in disbelief at his behaviour.

"For 5 months, you completely ignored me, no late night conversations, no last minute homework dates, not a single word. You didn't even spare me a glance. 5 MONTHS, Bill." You said, your eyes bleeding with tears. You held them back. "Do you know how much that hurt, Bill? I get you lost Beverly, but you're not the only one. I lost my best friend, Bill, and you should've been there for me, just like I was always there for you, but no. I didn't just lose one of my best friends. I lost both of my best friends." You said, angrily.

Bill was speechless. He thought you'd be upset, he braced himself to be yelled at, but he couldn't have prepared himself for that. "Y-Y/N.." He stuttered, unsure of what to say. You both knew there wasn't anything he could say. "The others left me too, you know. After you disappeared, the rest of the group fell apart. One by one. I've been all alone for months." You finished, your voice cracking. You waited quietly to see if Bill would speak. He didn't, only averted his gaze to the ground.

"It doesn't matter anyway, though. I'm leaving Derry. Tomorrow." Bill's head snapped up, eyes blown wide. "W-what?" He stuttered, and you sighed. "I'm moving. Tomorrow. And I'm not planning on coming back." You said, determinedly, and trying not to cry in front of him, because honestly, every word you spoke was shattering your heart, bit by bit. "B-B-But w-what a-a-ab-about our p-prom-promise?" Bill asked, his face showing all the pain you'd felt over the past few months.

"I'll come back for that; but sure as hell, not for you." You said. You were done with Bill. Yes, you were madly in love with him, but he obviously didn't feel the same, and he'd broken your heart, without knowing he did. "Y-Y-You d-don't mean th-that.." He said quietly, hurt evident in his voice. "Yes, I do Bill. For years, I've loved you, and watched you love someone else. I settled for being your friend; but you wouldn't even give me that. I'm leaving, and I'm not looking back. Hell, I don't even know where we're going. I just know it's far away from here." At this point, Bill was crying, but you refused to cry in front of him.

"I-I'll m-miss y-y-you." He managed, and you shook your head. "Will you?" He opened his mouth to answer, but you cut him off. "If you really cared, you would've been here. I wouldn't be leaving. It's your fault." He looked down, ashamed. "Goodbye, Bill." You said, shutting the door slowly. "Goodbye, Y/N." Was all you heard, before the door clicked shut, and his tear stained face was gone from your view.

Both of you broke down, backs pressed against the door separating the two of you; the once inseparable best friends, saying goodbye one last time. You leaned back against the door, tears freely running down your face. Bill sat on the opposite side of the door, tears sliding freely down his face too. "I love you." You both whispered, in sync. Of course, you'd never know that was said by each other.

Because that was the last time you ever saw Bill Denbrough.